A woman on Reddit has asked if she’s in the wrong for backing out of her sister’s wedding amid what is apparently known in her family as the dog incident.
It’s part of the popular AITA forum, wherein people put their life decisions before a jury of strangers. It’s an acronym for “Am I the [you-know-what]?”
The most viral of these divides readers, and this one topped Reddit’s home page over the weekend. Wrote the woman, who asked the internet if she’s wrong for refusing to be in her sister’s wedding after her sister backed out of hers when her dog passed away:
“Two days before my wedding, her 14 year old dog passed away unexpectedly. I was obviously sympathetic, but she called me sobbing, saying she couldn’t emotionally handle coming to the wedding because she was too devastated. I tried to talk her down, even offered to have someone bring her home early if it was too much, but she refused and didn’t show up.
It hurt. A lot. She missed one of the biggest days of my life, and I had no maid of honor. We didn’t talk much after that. A few months ago, she got engaged and just last week asked me to be her maid of honor.”
That’s a sticky wicket. Here’s what readers had to say about this situation.
Is it wrong to skip your sister’s wedding as maid of honor after losing your dog?
This is the central, viral question, even if it’s being asked indirectly. Most readers say no, it’s perfectly understandable to back out when your dog passes away. Writes a top response:
“I think she couldn’t win, really. It was only 2 days after her dog passed. She wasn’t ready. Either she skips your wedding and you’re mad about that, or she comes to your wedding, breaks down and ends up drawing attention whether she really intends to or not. You’d probably be even madder about that. The fact of the loss sucks, and the disruptive timing sucks, too.”
But what about the sister’s planned response to not do the same years later? Is it cool for her to back out, too, as maid of honor?
Only if one is doing it out of spite, argues the top-liked response. Now, if this poster genuinely doesn’t feel up for the obligations, sure. But that doesn’t seem to be the case here.
Either way, the original poster of the story is being called out for being in the wrong: She shouldn’t have been so upset that her sister pulled out years ago amid the dog’s passing; she shouldn’t now do the same.
Losing dogs is on par emotionally with losing family members, so extending grace here is easy, even if it also seems absurd. A dog is an animal, after all. A dog is not a human. And yet, the love we have for our canine companions is real. That’s the underpinning piece of the puzzle.
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