America’s sweetheart Ellen DeGeneres loves surprising her guest with their celebrity crushes. Want to marry Adam Levine? Ellen can arrange a meeting. Do you love Justin Bieber? She might just send him to your house… or kidnap you in a box and bring you to the show to meet him (apparently a lot of people love the Bieb) She’s even surprised celebrities with other celebrities, like the time she brought Oprah on to talk about farming with Tiffany Haddish.
Ellen even got a little surprise herself last year on her 60th birthday.
All these great moments got people wondering “What if I was on Ellen?” Turns out their answers were a tad darker than they usually like to get on upbeat daytime television shows.
Me on Ellen— ⚰Princess Morgan⁷⚰ (@PrincessMorganB) March 4, 2019
Ellen: "So I heard you like Castlevania?"
Me: "I DO"
*hundreds of night creatures descend upon the studio*
Me: "Oh my God Ellen you didn't"
me on ellen— rian (@darlingadora) March 2, 2019
ellen: so i heard you love the ocean
(the studio starts flooding)
me: omg ellen you didn’t
on ellen— alicia loves liia (@7seasofdeaky) March 4, 2019
ellen: so i heard you're a big fan of joe mazzello's nose
(joe walks in like photo below)
me: omg ellen you didn't pic.twitter.com/8H6tKGbwW8
me on ellen— ♕Lina Claire♕ (@UnifierLyone) March 4, 2019
ellen: so i heard you love the great old ones
(the studio trembles as it is approached by forms we cannot comprehend)
me: o m g ellen you didn’t
me on ellen— joy 🌸 (@kirishimami) March 2, 2019
ellen: so i heard you're a big fan of anime?
ellen: fucking weeb
*on Ellen*— Iisi (@cavedevice) February 27, 2017
ELLEN: so i hear u tweet about wanting to die
ME: haha yeah, i do
*Death comes out, creeps up behind me*
ME: omg ellen you didnt
me: *on ellen*— chel (@acklesbucky) March 4, 2019
ellen: so I heard you love the winter soldier
*the winter soldier theme starts playing*
me: omg ellen you didn’t
me: *gets assassinated*
Me on Ellen— Mateo 🚂x8 (@_justmateo_) March 5, 2019
Ellen: So I hear you like Disney
Me: Ya lol
(Walt Disney’s frozen head rolls in)
Me: omg Ellen you didn’t
me on ellen— lex :) (@hithereimlex) March 3, 2019
Ellen: so i heard you’re a big fan of Ellen
Me: yeah you’re amazing
*Ellen walks on stage*
Me: what the fuck is happening
These jokes might seem a little dark for Ellen fans, who love her normally positive and uplifting show, but don’t forget that DeGeneres started her carrer as a standup comedian in the 1980s. The things she no doubt heard in greenrooms back then probably make these memes seem like knock knock jokes. It’s a safe bet that, if she gets wind of them, she’ll find the new memes hilarious.