“How did you know your partner was the one??”
The Daily Dot explores the role of perceived commitment in making that special spark last a lifetime. TikToker @in.a.pod.ai posts nuggets of relationship wisdom and promotes his newly founded app, In A Pod.
What is perceived commitment?
@in.a.pod.ai quotes a Princeton study of 11,000 couples that examines the effects of bonding strategies on committed relationships. He says the study defined perceived commitment as both people “feeling like their partner is committed to the relationship for the long term.” This means that vocalizing your future intentions builds trust in that partner.
The Daily Dot could not find such a study from Princeton. However, a study published by the National Institutes of Health in 2024 suggests an opposing scenario of perceived commitment. This fact check isn’t with the intention to debunk any relationship advice from @in.a.pod.ai. There’s also a study out of Loyola University in Chicago that assesses self-esteem as a factor in these commitment practices. The point is, take all this information with a grain of salt. No two relationships are the same!
How can this help you build a healthy relationship?
One way @in.a.pod.ai says you can enhance perceived commitment in your relationship is to be specific about long-term intentions. This could be as simple as “I’m excited for our future together.” It can also be showing excitement for a shared vacation coming up.
By sharing intimacy through mutual effort, you are making your relationship stronger than by simply saying, “I love you,” @in.a.pod.ai says. He adds that other commitment practices include coming through reliably for small daily promises. This could be making time to drink coffee together in the morning or reserving Friday nights for date nights. @in.a.pod.a says it shows your partner you care about where the relationship is going. And on top of creating psychological safety, sharing mundane tasks can make them more fun and add a level of whimsy to your day. Cooking has now become cooking together, which could mean a combined karaoke session over your tacos!
@in.a.pod.ai How did you know your partner was the one??
♬ original sound – In a Pod
Viewers from both sides
@in.a.pod.ai received a lot of feedback for his tea time expertise. Some people loved the positivity.
“Wait I love this, so many people focus on the qualities of a person and not their intentions. Keeping this in mind !!”
And some were more skeptical.
One comment read, “Did this but somehow didn’t work out.”
They got a response from the original poster, ensuring them that their efforts were not in vain.
“You can be confident in the fact that you were doing all the right things at least. Eventually it’ll lead to success :)”
And lastly, an unfortunate creme de la crumbs: “My husband used to talk about us growing old together then he suddenly left me after 15 years.”
We all want our relationships to pan out, and you can try so hard only to have it fall short. However, that doesn’t mean the work wasn’t worth the possibility of a happy ending. On that note, we wish you all good luck and happy dating!
The Daily Dot reached out to @in.a.pod.ai for more information.
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