woman in bed with caption 'I had to call security to get him escorted out of my building' (l) door with caption 'POV you went on a first date with a guy who ordered $200 more than you did then asked you to split the bill so you went to the bathroom and never came back and now he's at your front door' (c) woman in bed with caption 'he found my address online or something' (r)

@ivnursefran/TikTok @ivnursefran/TikTok Remix by Caterina Cox

‘I had to call security to get him escorted out of the building’: Woman says first date asked her to split the bill, showed up at her door when she didn’t pay

‘I would have called the police. Way too scary’


Jack Alban


A nurse shared the frightening aftermath of a first date gone wrong after the man she met insisted she split the bill evenly—even though he racked up $200 of charges for his own food.

Fran (@ivnursefran) posted about her experience on TikTok in an initial viral clip that’s garnered over 687,000 views on the popular social media platform.

She followed up the six-second video with an explainer detailing what happened. The explainer begins with a stitch of the initial clip, in which the TikToker recorded knocking sounds coming from the other side of her closed front door. “POV you went on a first date with a guy who ordered $200 more than you did and then asked you to split the bill so you went to the bathroom and never came back and now he’s at your door,” Fran wrote in an on-screen caption.

@ivnursefran #stitch with @IV Nurse Fran ♬ FEEL THE GROOVE – Queens Road, Fabian Graetz

The TikToker delineated the situation further in her follow-up video: “I had to call security to get him escorted out of my building. I didn’t even tell him where I lived. I met him at the restaurant. He found my address online or something. I had no mutual friends with him.”

The social media user stated that the man didn’t seem like the type of person who would go to such lengths to try and get back the money he spent. “He seemed totally normal on the date, but after you asked me to pay 50 percent of the bill when you rack up $200 more than I did, that’s not gonna fly with me,” she said. “I’m literally gonna get up. I Venmoed him my portion of it when I got home. I found his Venmo through his phone number. This sh*t doesn’t fly with me.”

She added that she’s “not cool” with guys who aren’t willing to pay for a dinner bill, saying that if they are not “financially stable” enough to cover that cost, they’re not in a position to build a family with someone.

“If you wanna spend time with me and invest yourself in me, or invest your time in me, cool, pay for the dinner,” she said. “If you’re not even cool with paying for the dinner, then clearly you don’t have any money to invest in a girl who wants to build a family. If you’re not financially stable, what do you want from me? Bye.”

Commenters had a litany of responses to the video.

One individual remarked that they wouldn’t have sent the first date any money whatsoever: “I would have venmo’d him NOTHING. The audacity.”

“Wow, like I’m not against splitting the bill but only if it’s roughly equal. That’s crazy!!!” someone else said.

One viewer warned the TikToker to check what personal information of hers may be floating around online: “definitely check your digital foot print. that address leak is scary.”

Others thought the man followed her home and didn’t find her address on the internet: “I support you making sure your address isn’t online. But he probably followed you home,” one said.

“I think he just followed her home bc aint no way he found it…” another added.

Another viewer suggested the TikToker start a paper trail on the incident in case the man bothered her again: “If he comes again or if you see him, please call the police. Write down what happened on your comp today & take contemporaneous notes with dates/time.”

In a second follow-up video, Fran clarified some commenters’ questions, the first being why the TikToker would reveal her address on a first date. She said that she didn’t provide this information and firmly believes her date found it online.

Fran went on to give further details about her date, explaining that he was a software engineer with some technical acumen, who she thought was probably able to find out where she lived using her phone number.

While several folks urged her to expose who the man was, she said that she wouldn’t because she’s a medical professional, and while she cannot diagnose him, she believes the man might be battling with some type of mental illness. She added that even though he put her in an “uncomfortable position” and “traumatized” her, she’s not going to go out of her way to “dox someone.”

Fran then explained why the meal was so expensive and why she did not want to split the bill evenly.

The establishment, according to Fran, was a Michelin-star restaurant that had a prix fixe-style menu with add-on options. She only added the house salad, while her date added “short rib,” “expensive meats,” “expensive caviar,” and other options. Fran said her date would tell her before he added anything, and in response, she explained that her dietary restrictions and alcohol allergy would prevent her from consuming his additions.

“So, even not being able to eat some of the things—or, most of the things, rather—that he added on, he still was insistent on my paying 50 percent,” she said. Fran also noted that the way her date spoke about himself made it sound like he could afford the add-ons without her contribution.

The TikToker continued to say that she didn’t post the video for clout. Rather, she wanted to caution folks against going to expensive restaurants or giving out their phone number on a first date.

Thankfully, Fran said that her building’s security only took about “three minutes” to remove the man from her front door and have him escorted from the premises. “I’m grateful that I live in such a safe place. I hope that nobody ever has to go through this,” she said.

The Daily Dot contacted Fran via TikTok comment for further information.

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