Jessica Valenti, author and co-founder of website Feministing, noticed a troubling pattern on the Reddit relationship forums this week.
“Why is every Reddit relationship submission either from a dude who wants to break up with his gf because she only shaves 6 days a week or a girl trying to find a reason to stay with her bf who hoards rotting mouse carcasses,” she tweeted.
She may have a point. From illegal yoghurt man, who filled their apartment with rotting tubs of the stuff, to Power Point man, who thought a presentation on why her feelings were wrong would get his wife back into kink with him, the men of Reddit relationships seem to be a bit, um… off, shall we say.
— Lili Yochana (@liliyo302) June 14, 2019
https://twitter.com/HumanLevelJen/status/1139232757509263360
Of course you do get the rare female nightmare on there, like the woman who was too vegan to allow an exterminator to get rid of their bedbugs, but for the most part, the women of Reddit relationships deserve better.
The 2 r/relationships subgenres:
— Amelia Bloody Rose @ameliarosewrite.bsky.social: (@AmeliaRoseWrite) August 8, 2018
1. Dear Reddit, I am the worst, please advise
2. Dear Reddit, I think my partner is the best but they are actually the worst, please advise
People have all sorts of theories as to why.
https://twitter.com/katebryden/status/1141549912523509760
https://twitter.com/Nicole_Cliffe/status/1038124826517417984
Mostly around the unfair double standards that women and men are held to in relationships and life in general.
https://twitter.com/KGisWriting/status/1141672523349843968
men posting on r/relationships: my girlfriend won’t do anal, is this a dealbreaker
— alisa (@brakehage) June 9, 2018
women posting on r/relationships: so my husband fucked my sister and spends all of our money on video games and hates my dog but one time he made me pasta. i love him so much what do i do
https://twitter.com/farwent/status/1141872860828512256
My brother used to pee out his bedroom window and when I would complain my mother would defend him and tell me someone was probably using the bathroom and he couldn’t wait. But she’d lecture me for not setting the table properly w knife blades facing in.
— Tabbyette 🇺🇦🌻Time to pass voting rights (@Tabbyette112) June 20, 2019
https://twitter.com/katebryden/status/1141549912523509760
Low bar for men. Like shower and have ambitions, while they still expect to be in charge of a relationship, meanwhile women with jobs/prospects are manipulated or controlled by a lot of men who expect submissive women who are easily controlled. Society has a shit framework.
— Jo (@Aristophaenes) June 21, 2019
Some people got a little stuck on the mouse carcass part, too.
Crap did my girl find my dead mouse collection? :p
— 3 Kobolds in a Trench Coat 🧦🥑🧢🌈 (@dimiroperative) June 20, 2019
…after he catches and eats mice in front of her.
— Dr. Vasilina Orlova (Василина Орлова) (@vasilina_orlova) June 20, 2019
…so does that mean the guys with the mouse carcasses are single?
— Dafna Steinberg (@AlizaySteinberg) June 20, 2019
Because women need to demand better of men as a whole? I mean if I dated a mouse carcass hoarder he better be doing something with them — like making taxidermied vignettes of rodent inspired tea parties or something.
— Theophanes Avery (@TheophanesAvery) June 20, 2019
Or the classic situation where the gf shaves all the rotting mouse carcasses. What a pickle!
— Nick Moss (@TheBravesDH) June 20, 2019
There are also a disturbing number of men out there peeing into jars and out of windows. Seriously? Explain yourselves.
My brother did the same thing. He even admitted that he would call his best friend up, whose window, a few houses away, he could see from his window, and they would both pee out their windows in unison.
— TheRealLC (@XTheRealLC) June 20, 2019
YES. When my brother moved out of the family house, my mom found a bunch of pee jars and glasses. Did he stop doing this? Or are women writing into Reddit about him? WHO COULD SAY???
— Amy Spalding (@theames) June 20, 2019
I had an old roommate that had piss cups, overflowing garbage and dirty dishes in his bed. Turns out he was doing meth tho🤷
— THEE Big lil spooky sam (@yamamalam) June 20, 2019
And yes, I kicked him out. I also took photos cos I didn't think folks we knew would believe how gross he was.
Valenti isn’t the only one to have noticed either.
men posting on r/relationships: my girlfriend won’t do anal, is this a dealbreaker
— alisa (@brakehage) June 9, 2018
women posting on r/relationships: so my husband fucked my sister and spends all of our money on video games and hates my dog but one time he made me pasta. i love him so much what do i do
"My boyfriend is my soulmate and absolutely the best partner I've ever had, but he skinned my dog and is out in the street, howling and wearing the skin as a loincloth. How do I better communicate my boundaries without hurting him?"
— Tom Tombadil (@ChesterRamoray) June 21, 2019
The men of Reddit need to do better.
https://twitter.com/sybann/status/1141680286595452928
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