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People on Twitter are posting the 5 weirdest jobs they’ve had for this meme
From ‘hoe’ to ‘housewife’ and ‘joker’ to ‘smoker.’
A Twitter post has inspired users to share their five most random or interesting jobs, from chemical hazardous waste removal tech to working the line at Golden Corral. But as the meme post got more popular, things started taking a bizarre turn.
The “five jobs” meme all began normal enough. Twitter user @spideypencil posted five jobs they have held, including a middle school teacher, auto insurance salesperson, and a registered nurse.
5 jobs I've had?
1)Jr High Science Teacher
2)Chemical Hazardous Waste Removal tech
Tagging 5 people @OyeKaren17 @FigmentsFancies @OnceBittenBella @kelbellx0 @dateswhitecoats
— Drewster RN (@spideypencil) April 22, 2019
People jumped in to earnestly share their own personal career journey, which besides a few odd jobs, all seemed pretty regular.
5 jobs i’ve had:
1) customer service at a pizza store
2) before & after school care teacher
3) graphic designer for a winery
5) owner of harper & willow
— Jess Conte (@jessconte) April 24, 2019
5 Jobs I’ve Had:
– Hollister Sales Associate (also A&F for one semester, but it’s mostly the same) 👖
– ACT Tutor 📚
– Shakespeare Camp Counselor 🧙🏼♀️
– Production Assistant ☕️
– Writing Script Coverage (I know that’s not the format but “Script Coverage Writer” seemed off) 💻 https://t.co/coZtT3eHdv
— Safiya Nygaard (@safiyajn) April 24, 2019
5 jobs I've had:
1. Children's theatre actor
2. Chocolate/candy store employee
3. Bagel slinger/prep chef
4. Convenience stork clerk/barista
5. Museum specimen preparator
aka the basis for my origin story https://t.co/Td9paNNclU
— Emily Graslie 🌸🐝 (@Ehmee) April 24, 2019
5 Jobs I’ve had
1. Icecream Scooper
2. Piano/Guitar Kids Teacher
3. Grocery Store Cashier
4. Restaurant Server
5. Social Media Intern https://t.co/bq2iRBxk3j
— lauren ✄ (@laurDIY) April 24, 2019
5 jobs I’ve had:
– varsity shop
– convention center events
– Khoas restaurant
– receptionist at medical office
– SAHM / youtuber https://t.co/1xg60flmMr
— Keren Swanson (@kerenswan) April 24, 2019
But as the “5 jobs” post got more popular, it became increasingly used for jokes and inane responses.
5 jobs I’ve had
1. Tim Hortons hortoner
2. Gas station gasser
3. Porn star
4. Best Buy bester
5. YouTuber https://t.co/m0P9lIBDhg
— Ali H 🙈 (@The_AliH) April 24, 2019
For example, Samantha Irby proved that yes, you can turn a hoe into a housewife. Thank you, Samantha.
five jobs i've had:
— samantha irby (@wordscience) April 24, 2019
A Twitter account parodying the Irish border got in on the action.
Five jobs I’ve had:
1. Series of county boundaries
2. Temporary gerrymandered border
3. Long-term gerrymandered border
4. Semi-retired border
5. Brexit thwarter https://t.co/A1sroI1KwO
— The Irish Border (@BorderIrish) April 24, 2019
And this person took inspiration from a Steve Miller Band song for his career path.
My first five jobs:
3) midnight toker
4) guy who does his lovin’ on the run
5) tax accountant
— Bill Corbett (@BillCorbett) April 24, 2019
Ross O’Donovan may or may not have trolled Twitter with their five jobs list.
Five jobs I've had:
1. Hungry Jack's fry cook.
2. Warehouse worker.
3. Freelance animator
4. Animation teacher
5. Professional troll https://t.co/Y0GM2eoDyW
— Ross O'Donovan (@RubberNinja) April 24, 2019
And this person may have been inspired by Meredith Brooks’ song “Bitch.”
Five jobs I’ve had:
— Andy Mientus (@andymientus) April 24, 2019
A rundown of different sexual “jobs” was a reoccurring joke from the more provocative corner of Twitter.
The rude version of this would be to say:
but I'm not rude, I'm a very good boy, I'd never tweet such filth, and you can thank me for that pic.twitter.com/wzmsgoGyND
— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) April 24, 2019
But the stand-out employee was this very good boy who has probably excelled at every job he’s ever held.
Five jobs my dog has had
– barking at cyclists
– barking at dog walkers
– barking at vets
– barking at me
– strategic partnerships manager pic.twitter.com/OpXy3To4g8
— Neil Brennan (@nrdbrennan) April 24, 2019
Eilish O'Sullivan is an editorial intern for the Daily Dot studying journalism and government at the University of Texas at Austin. Her work has appeared in the Austin Chronicle and the Daily Texan.