- People on Twitter ask whose ancestors would’ve passed immigrant ‘wealth test’ Monday 6:54 PM
- Kobe Bryant helicopter crash mocked in teen’s TikTok video Monday 6:38 PM
- Chiefs, Bears, Packers have Twitter accounts hacked Monday 3:48 PM
- Washington Post reporter suspended amid backlash over Kobe Bryant tweet Monday 3:08 PM
- America is united in hating Ken Starr’s impeachment hat Monday 3:01 PM
- In ‘Cuties,’ the contradictions of growing up come to a head Monday 1:55 PM
- Racist tweets blame fruit bat soup for coronavirus Monday 1:25 PM
- What is the #ILeftTheGOP movement? Monday 1:21 PM
- The Grammys were weird and sad—but the Billy Porter hat memes offered some levity Monday 12:36 PM
- Auschwitz Museum calls on Facebook to ban Holocaust denialism Monday 11:59 AM
- YouTuber who said his girlfriend was dead now says he faked it Monday 11:42 AM
- Review: Kentucky Route Zero is one of the most magical games ever made Monday 11:00 AM
- Backlash grows against Clearview as lawsuit looms Monday 10:58 AM
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- Democrats call on John Bolton to testify after book bombshell Monday 9:56 AM
Woman details finding a rat in her toilet, horrifying the internet
It’s a phobia you didn’t realize you had.
“Half an hour after the kids went to bed, one of them came to Steve in the kitchen and said they couldn’t poop bc there was a rat in their toilet,” Cliffe wrote. “Reader, there was a rat in their toilet.”
half an hour after the kids went to bed, one of them came to Steve in the kitchen and said they couldn’t poop bc there was a rat in their toilet— Nicole Cliffe (@Nicole_Cliffe) July 25, 2019
reader, there was a rat in their toilet
Some readers will now forever check their toilet bowls before sitting down to do the business.
“No. NO. I HAVE LITERAL NIGHTMARES ABOUT THIS AND SOMETIMES HAVE TO GET OFF THE TOILET MID-PEE JUST TO CHECK IF I FORGOT TO LOOK BEFORE I SAT DOWN,” one user wrote.
No. NO. I HAVE LITERAL NIGHTMARES ABOUT THIS AND SOMETIMES HAVE TO GET OFF THE TOILET MID-PEE JUST TO CHECK IF I FORGOT TO LOOK BEFORE I SAT DOWN— Louisa 🌈👭 (@LouisatheLast) July 25, 2019
No thank you, I shan't have any more of the internets this evening.— The Disaster Ballet (@disasterballet) July 25, 2019
I instantly regret scrolling through Twitter on the toilet right now.— Kate (@goonerkate) July 25, 2019
As it turns out, rats making their way into toilet bowls isn’t an anomaly. Rats apparently can swim up sewer lines, landing right into your toilet, especially if the sewage system is old.
Twitter users began sharing their own rat-in-toilet horror stories.
“We had a BABY rat in ours! Still alive! Swimming his best! Squealing pitifully for help! My mom rescued him, set him up in a little recovery room & warned off would-be disturbers with this sign,” Miranda Robinson wrote on Twitter.
We had a rat in our toilet when I was a kid! After that incident, my mom kept her sewing machine on the toilet lid so that any other rats that came up wouldn’t be able to get out. I had to ask her to move it every time I used to the bathroom.— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) July 25, 2019
My little brother and I once rescued a rat from the toilet. Tried to feed him cheese aggressively. He bit my brother.— Marianne (@mbrowntrigg) July 25, 2019
We didn’t get adults involved until we confessed “our new pet rat bit him!”
You’re not the only one and it could be worse 🤷♀️
We had a BABY rat in ours! Still alive! Swimming his best! Squealing pitifully for help! My mom rescued him, set him up in a little recovery room & warned off would-be disturbers with this sign pic.twitter.com/uUt0oR0LtK— Miranda Robinson (@MirRobinson) July 25, 2019
It happened to me at 5 AM one morning. My wife and I were jumping up-and-down screaming. She didn't know that there was a rat in the toilet; she thought there was a man in the bathroom. LOL by the time the exterminator got there, the rat was dead/drowned.— Carol duBois (@theCdB) July 25, 2019
When I lived in Nicaragua, a friend’s wife got bit on the ass by a rat as she went to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Total long-needle-rabies protocol in the abdomen.— Snuffy (@saintsnuffy) July 25, 2019
Others started sharing their own animal-toilet encounters, more or less horrifying depending on your phobia.
This is also good: pic.twitter.com/2drDAOaiUM— Jarin (@Jarin50926789) July 25, 2019
When I was a kid on the Texas Gulf Coast, a HUGE snake came UP through the toilet. I was in the bath tub at the time. The thing stood up to look at me. Mama made mashed snake before my eyes. No one made poop in my house for a week. It was right after a hurricane.— Marcia Mohr (@mlmohr) July 25, 2019
I once stayed at a friends house in Georgia & I went to pee & there was a SCORPION *IN* the toilet bowl & I was like, oh good i didn’t know i needed to be worried about such a thing but now i will never not look for a scorpion before i sit down— Sarah Kay (@kaysarahsera) July 25, 2019
Yup. Once in Turks and Caicos, mice would come up through the pipes but couldn't make it out of the toilet so I would build them little rafts so they wouldn't drown before maintenance could fish them out. Pretty sure everyone there thought I was bonkers.— Love, Lola (@LoveLolaHeart) July 25, 2019
My parents say in Kindegarten I ran in to go to the bathroom then started screaming because a *very upset* frog tried to jump out of the toilet when I tried to drown him 😆— Jen Wellllll Actually... (@jenwells) July 25, 2019
As a kid my folks gave me a bedroom in a former guest suite with its own bathroom (a big luxury in a house with four ppl). A few months in as I was sitting to pee I found an enormous tree frog in my toilet & literally never set foot in the bathroom again to my parents great angst— nikki (@thenikkibus) July 25, 2019
Oh my god, burn the house down and move. (This happened to my mom with a frog once; there was hopping involved. I still can’t think about it without laughing hysterically.)— Ali Trotta (@alwayscoffee) July 25, 2019
One hilarious false alarm turned out to be a used tampon, not a bloody rat.
My son once ran into the room screaming about a bloody rat in our toilet.— Michelle Mabelle (@s0ntdesm0tsqui) July 25, 2019
Nicole, it wasn't a rat. It was an improperly flushed tampon.
And that is how my 7 year old learned about menstruation.
A debate over what the worst animal to find in your toilet kicked off.
we had snakes and frogs but never a rat. a rat is a bridge too far.— tasha (@tashakaminsky) July 25, 2019
i know what to do w a snake. idk what to do w a rat. scream at my own ass i guess.— tasha (@tashakaminsky) July 25, 2019
Nah that’s a possum pic.twitter.com/vhdQZmNUEO— possum pioneer (@krisis86) July 25, 2019
A snake! I feel like a snake would be worse than a rat— Al Prazolam (@ungatomalo) July 25, 2019
*is from rural Texas* At least it wasn’t a snake, and at least it was dead!— Gerald Dudley (@Professor_D) July 25, 2019
A snake is the most horrifying, obviously.
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Siobhan Ball is a historian, archivist, and journalist. She also writes for Autostraddle and bi.org