Fuckboys seem to be everywhere in 2o16.
I look like a fuck boy in this shirt… well I am a fuck boy so yeah..
— junior (@juniorvlrl) August 25, 2016
i cant believe i'm a fuckboi
— HIATUS!JAX (@stankangsan) August 30, 2016
— Ōzaru🦍 (@91xCash) September 6, 2016
I am a fuck boy 😂😂😂😒😒
— แมงป่อง (@tausambal) August 10, 2016
These are tweets from dudes who have no qualms about admitting that yes, they are indeed fuckboys. Contrary to popular belief, being a fuckboy is more than just not being faithful in a relationship, prioritizing your bros above all other obligations, or just acting like an all around douchebag.
No, being a fuckboy also means that you’re living in a world where you’re perpetually misunderstood. Take a moment to think about all the fuckboys throughout history who changed the world.
Although America experienced historic economic growth during Bill Clinton’s presidency, he couldn’t hide the fact that he was inherently a fuckboy.
Tiger Woods is probably the greatest golfer of all time. Even he would admit to his fuckboy ways, though.
Jack Kerouac laid the groundwork for all the lit fuckboys running around Brooklyn right now thinking they’re beats.
Jay Z allegedly cheated on Beyoncé, which puts him in the upper echelon of fuckboys, because who tf does that?
Brad Pitt has never publicly done anything too fuckboy-esque but being that he’s so handsome, he most likely committed a slew of fuckboy crimes before settling down and adopting half of the world.
As you can see, even men who have contributed great things to society can’t hide their fuckboy souls. And now that it’s almost fall and fuckboys across the nation will have to hibernate until next summer, we need to honor them for all the bullshit they’ve put us through these past few months.
Yes, there’s a National Fuckboy (or Fuckboi) Day. But you can’t celebrate it until Sept. 17. Still, we couldn’t be happier that women and men have a national holiday to celebrate exes who couldn’t get their shit together.
The official Facebook page of this important occasion of remembrance describes it perfectly:
There already 48,000 people on board to give kudos to the various men and women who identify has fuckboys.
Can't even complain about fuckboys because I am a fuckboy
— bad luck chuck (@samaamihiir) August 24, 2016
So round up all the fuckboys in your circle of friends, at your school, at your job, in your neighborhood, at your favorite bar, in your church, etc., and honor them for being the not-so-good human that they just can’t help being. Because let’s face it, besides football, there’s nothing more American than being a supreme fuckboy.