Forget politics and religion, if you really want to start an argument at the next family get-to-together, just declare that Fruit Loops are the greatest breakfast cereal and watch the fireworks. What is it about “the best cereal” debate that fires the passion of children and stoners alike? Is it the simplicity of a bowl of cereal combined with the contemplative mood of early mornings? The sweet goodness combined with the wholesomeness of milk? Nostalgia and sugar? It’s a sure bet that whatever you grew up eating in front of the television is going to be near the top of your list. If your Saturday mornings were spent watching He-Man while devouring Lucky Charms, no Smurfs watching idiot is going to tell you that Cocoa Puffs are the best cereal.
CNN political reporter Greg Krieg recently ignited a small firestorm when he tweeted out a picture of breakfast cereal rankings that, surprise surprise, not everyone agreed on.
Find the people who did this and send them to The Hague pic.twitter.com/mbyYlk8UXM
— Greg Krieg (@GregJKrieg) March 14, 2017
It’s pretty clear that Krieg himself disapproves of the list, as he suggested its creators (no word on why he thinks it took more than one person) should go to trial in a court that is usually reserved for international war criminals.
Very quickly, the good citizens of Twitter condemned the list as well, with righteous indignation and furious anger.
@MarisaKabas what the fuck greg. WHAT THE FUCK
— lvl 45 chao$ potu$ (@thetomzone) March 14, 2017
Frosted Flakes IS the God Tier!!!
— Biden Wants To Cut Social Security (@rtyson82) March 14, 2017
Corn pops on the bottom? The Hague is too good.
— 𝓙𝓮𝓶𝓶𝓮 (@Jem758) March 14, 2017
Usually this kind of tier ranking is reserved for Player vs. Player video games, where it inspires similar controversy. In fact, the cereal image seems to be a direct parody of this tier ranking of Overwatch characters.
Which makes Winston the Apple Jacks of the video game community, while Bastion is Cinnamon Toast Crunch? Probably better to not do a one to one comparison. It’s confusing enough as it is.
Much like the video game debate, the great cereal controversy will continue to rage on with no clear winner in sight. Which makes sense as it’s a trick question. The correct answer is Peanut Butter Crunch mixed with Fruity Pebbles.