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@ashweecarter/TikTok Remix by Caterina Cox

‘I hate dates’: Viewers relate to woman who rehearses the same questions for yet another first date

'So what do you do for work?'


Eric Webb


Posted on Jul 26, 2023

Dating can feel like Groundhog’s Day after a while. How many times can you have the same conversation with different people you’ll probably never see again?

In May, TikTok creator Ashleigh Carter (@ashweecarter) posted a video that cut to the heart of the struggle, and the other creators are using that video’s sound to document their own frustrations. Carter’s original video has about 5.6 million views and 910,000 likes. The audio’s since been used in almost 6,000 TikToks, like this one by creator Becca Smith (@itsbeccasmith) that’s gone viral on its own.

@ashweecarter Going on another first date i fear. #dating #single #nycdating #dates #firstdate #fyp #foryoupage ♬ original sound – Ashleigh Carter

In Carter’s video, she gathers her belongings in a purse and sarcastically acts out the conversation she knows she’s about to have. “Going on another first date i fear,” the caption reads.

Some of the “banter” Carter has with her imaginary date: “So what do you do for work?” “Do you like it?” followed by a fake laugh and a raspberry. “How many siblings do you have?”

“When you meet the right guy, you gotta show him this video,” someone commented. Carter replied, “Girl I’m hoping this is what does it for me.”

“Getting the ick even thinking of ‘small talk’. I just CAN’T do it,” another person commented.

One commenter riffed with their own faux-banter: “Oh your favorite color’s orange??? Fascinating! Tell me more.”

“This should be in the Smithsonian,” another comment on Carter’s video read.

The response is similar on other videos using Carter’s TikTok sound. A couple from Smith’s version: “Same. Like oh let me just get ready to go try to impress someone who is gonna waste my time,” and “Can’t even get past ‘Hey how are you?’ anymore.” The caption of Smith’s video is, simply, “I hate dates.”

As this is hardly a new problem with dating, you can find plenty of conversation tips for dates online. The Science of People recommends things like, “If you could get on a plane right now to anywhere in the world, where would you go?” and “When was the last time you laughed so hard that your stomach hurt?”

The Daily Dot reached out to Carter and Smith via Instagram direct message.

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*First Published: Jul 26, 2023, 2:51 pm CDT