Ahhh the delicate art of the subtweet. How to complain about a co-worker, friend, or some other human, without them finding out. It’s a tricky situation at best.
If you don’t know, subtweet is short for subliminal tweet, meaning you’re talking smack about someone without actually using their Twitter handle or even mentioning their name. It’s basically the Internet equivalent of talking behind someone’s back. Like instead of tweeting:
Hey @saltygravy, why were you such a dick at my party last night?
You might tweet:
You know what good people don’t do? Show up at a pot luck with half a box of pop tarts and then drink all the beer.
Or you might, for instance, tweet.
I’m sick and tired of the sexist smug white dude running the United States government.
And people would know exactly who you meant without you having to mention Vladimir Putin.
Huh? U must not be reading my tweets. Didn't say a word about u. I love u just as much. But u should speak on this. @taylorswift13— YIKES (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Obviously, there’s another danger to subtweeting. Sure it might feel good to blow off steam about your annoying roommate or boss, but what if it gets back to them? That’s where Corey Kindberg comes in. He’s a New York social media editor and had a little time on his hands to do people’s dirty work.
if you have a subtweet but don't want to tweet it just DM it to me and i will tweet it for you— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 5, 2017
Boy were people happy to take him up on the offer, with tweets that ranged from petty, to savage, to everything in between.
just because you're sad and hate your job doesn't give you the right to wear flip flops to work and make everyone else miserable— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 5, 2017
No one gives a shit about your daughter's wedding because we all hate you.— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 6, 2017
will you motherfuckers stop shaking your salads in the newsroom?— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 6, 2017
just bc you're going off to better things in life doesn't change the fact that you have a tiny dick & the emotional capacity of a 12 yr old— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 5, 2017
your music sucks please don't quit your day job OH WAIT YOU DONT HAVE ONE— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 6, 2017
Why tf would you have a three way with your cousin?— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 6, 2017
It’s important to note that not all subtweets have to be negative. Sometimes it’s just something you’re afraid to say to the person’s face.
i still have sex dreams about you sometimes— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 6, 2017
Other times you’re just a conflicted weirdo who watches too much SpongeBob.
boy, you look like handsome squidward and everyone roasts the hell out of your annoying ass speaking voice— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 6, 2017
Kindberg’s inbox is still flooded with messages, so we can probably count on a neverending stream of snarky complaints and wicked burns. As for the man himself, he says he’s learned at least one thing.
after doing my subtweet thing yesterday i have discovered that a lot of women are mad at other women for their man's shitty behavior— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 6, 2017
Oh and that viral fame comes with a price.
My mentions are a fucking trash fire.— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) June 8, 2017