The definitive ranking of all Twitters

Presented without commentary.

 

Brendan O'Connor

Internet Culture

Published Jan 16, 2014   Updated May 31, 2021, 9:14 pm CDT

Presented without commentary, with love to Tim Herrera.

19) Media Twitter

This Is A Tweet About A BuzzFeed Story About Other BuzzFeed Stories About A Valleywag Post By Sam Biddle About A Racist Tweet

— Brendan O’Connor (@_grendan) December 22, 2013

18) One Direction Twitter

17) Subtweet Twitter

Sometimes I think my family is fucked up, and then someone tweets something and I think nah we’re good.

— Erin Not the Niners (@erinscafe) January 13, 2014

seamless is over hyped and they never tweet me

— meow meow meow (@SubtweetCat) January 13, 2014

Ironic that I am a judge for the Truman Capote award when Capote in a druggy interview said he hated me & that I should be executed. LOL.

— Joyce Carol Oates (@JoyceCarolOates) October 14, 2013

When Joyce Carol Oates subtweets, she brings the fire.

— azadag (@azadag) June 12, 2013

16) Politics Twitter

The real #Scandal tonight is → 1.3mill Americans will be left in the cold if Congress fails act https://t.co/XGnmbPOwGP #RenewUI

— Sandy Levin (@repsandylevin) December 20, 2013

15) [Tie] Snarky Twitter/Earnest Twitter

the true meaning of christmas https://t.co/T8awChFXHp

— matt (@mattbuchanan) December 25, 2013

I want to be serious for a minute at the end of 2013. Yolo sounds dumb but it’s actually real. Make sure you’re yoloing well

— Laura June (@laura_june) January 1, 2014

GUYS. THIS IS LITERALLY THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE. WEST VILLAGE @IHOP IS CLOSING. https://t.co/VsDaxCYrAe

— Tim (@TimHerrera) January 14, 2014

13) Weird Twitter

Time to do several fucking perfect wolf howls at the nascar men

— wint (@dril) December 30, 2013

12) Animal Twitter

v good, v rare wolf here RT @lincolnparkzoo: Red wolf Rozene poses in the snow in this photo by Keeper Cassy Kutilek. pic.twitter.com/S9qcZPBuwN

— Tu BiSh’vat Nosowitz (@dannosowitz) January 14, 2014

11) Hair Twitter

@jessicakroy are your #curls on point for tonight? thinking of re-curling before I leave

— Taylor Lorenz (@TaylorLorenz) December 16, 2013

10) Food Twitter

I’m scared for the day when all food groups have been ranked! RT @rachelysanders: The Definitive Ranking Of Chips https://t.co/HoxrRofQHI

— joe satran (@joe_satran) January 15, 2014

9) Awards Show Twitter

My brain https://t.co/lHT5grwNpG

— Jordan Cohen (@jorcohen) January 13, 2014

8) Sports Twitter

#LeBroning 2 rings https://t.co/fQv6PFZYdE

— Michael Calcaterra (@lilCALC) January 13, 2014

7) TV Twitter


 

6) Feminist Twitter

Hey guys, wanna see old dudes debate whether women should be able to spend their own money on abortion? https://t.co/OeAr5u5j8A

— Erin Gloria Ryan (@morninggloria) January 15, 2014

5) Black Twitter

#blacktwitter watching them open that best picture envelope on the #GoldenGlobes pic.twitter.com/ltWXOA4vSs

— Raymond Jackson (@ray_jackson_) January 13, 2014

4) Black Feminist Twitter

I mean, this is truth: RT @dreamhampton I’mma let you finish, but Black Women basically run Twitter #SmartBlackWomenofTwitter

— BridgetMarieInDC (@BridgetMarie) August 27, 2013

3) Selfie Twitter

PB&J Sandwich Selfie #SelfieOlympics pic.twitter.com/FLjmKPxFdm

— The Selfie Olympics (@SelfieOlympics) January 13, 2014

2) Weather Twitter

The penguin makes a great addition to @JaniceHuff4ny‘s weather hit pic.twitter.com/wwawI6IFIl

— Ethan Klapper (@ethanklapper) January 7, 2014

1) Dad Twitter

My son has arrived! Thank you Lord and may He help me be the best dad I can be!! pic.twitter.com/cMAIfPZWxb

— Jason Elam (@Jason_Elam) January 15, 2014

@evcon @cwarzel Dad twitter is all around you

— Rusty Foster (@rustyk5) October 24, 2013

Photo via stevegarfield/Flickr

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*First Published: Jan 16, 2014, 9:30 am CST