Twitter/@Pornhub Carlos Devora

BTW

Philadelphia officials attempted to stop football fans from climbing the city poles in January, but that did little to stop deranged Eagles fans. Good thing Pornhub has a solution.

After Crisco oil failed when the Eagles beat the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC championship game, Pornhub has generously offered the city of Philadelphia 110 Gallons of lube to slather on the city’s light poles for the Super Bowl.

The lube, much like the Crisco, is intended to deter excited fans from climbing the light poles, and prevent injuries in case of a Super Bowl win. However, fans saw the Crisco more as a challenge than a safety precaution.“The fact that we were greasing them doesn’t mean we were daring people to climb them,” Sgt. Eric Gripp, a police spokesman, told Philly.com. “It’s the exact opposite.”

The city has yet to respond to Pornhub’s offer but is reportedly using the alternative of gear oil, according to Fox 29. Gear oil has a thicker consistency than Crisco, and the gooey substance is also tricky to remove from clothes. Whether its coating abilities work better than lube is still unclear, but any solution is better than none.

Lube, gear oil, or Crisco, attempting to climb lubricated poles this weekend (or any weekend) is not encouraged. Choices, Philly.

H/T Mashable

Layer 8
From Our VICE Partners

Pure, uncut internet. Straight to your inbox.