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When the Pokémon Company announced the new starter monster for Pokemon Sun & Moon back in May, the internet roasted the hell out of them. Some were excited for Rowlet, the round owl, but everyone hated Popplio, the smug-looking seal.
On Tuesday, we finally got to see what these unfortunate creatures evolve into:
Meet Dartrix, Torracat, and Brionne. They… are garbage.
Dartrix evolved from the cute and chubby Rowlet, who was the only new starter people seemed positive about. Looks like that’s ruined now.
my favourite pokemon? oh, it’s the owl who looks like he’s in a band only your dad remembers
— smash mouth all star (@pillowfort) October 4, 2016
dartrix writes your number in his phone and never calls. torracat is already getting dressed while you’re still cleaning up
— smash mouth all star (@pillowfort) October 4, 2016
dartrix looks like one of those stereotypical rich pretentious anime characters
— tori (@emolizards) October 4, 2016
Dartrix point never
— pumpkin spice zio (@zio_masada) October 4, 2016
Yeah gonna have Litten now… Rowlet… You turned into Hugh Grant. I ain’t having that in my team.
— ⚡️ILO⚡️ (@ArlowRyarda) October 4, 2016
RIP Rowlet. And Torracat, the new evolution of Litten the fire kitten, is getting roasted too—for being too conservative.
There’s nothing wrong with Litten’s evo, it’s just “bigger Litten”. The other two evos have a ton of personality, which I love
— Joshua Wittenkeller (@TheJWittz) October 4, 2016
Dartix: Amazing! Rowlett is running away as the best starter! Top 150 for sure.
Torracat: Yawn. Nothing new here. Bottom 200.
— Football Crank (@LakdifFlanchzed) October 4, 2016
Torracat, meanwhile, is basically Litten except buff and less scraggly-looking and that’s kinda boring to me
— SKELETONS BRUH (@KaiMonkey) October 4, 2016
And what’s that on its neck?
can we mention torracat’s fire testicle yet
— Lyeekha (@LY33KH4) October 4, 2016
i know it’s supposed to look like a bell but that thing on torracat’s neck is like… a third, exposed, eyeball
— ‘,:3c (@cryptid_dog) October 4, 2016
People do really want to see porn of Torracat, though, so I guess it’s got that going for it.
Can’t wait to see the Torracat nsfw too
— Za Fuul (@DarkTypeUmbreon) October 4, 2016
SOMEONE MAKE TORRACAT PORN PLEASE
— ✨PINK EXTRAORDINARY✨ (@PadzyanShark) October 4, 2016
theres already torracat porn
— Glydon (@Bruyvern) October 4, 2016
Hoo boy. OK, moving on to Brionne, who evolves from the much-maligned circus seal, Popplio. The critics are surely going to destroy this one, right?
Everyone who hated Popplio is loving Brionne so I’m Warey
— SKELETON 2.0 (@Skeletondoggy) October 4, 2016
I LOVE BRIONNE SO MCUH GIVE ME 10
— micah☆ @ diaruby t2 (@MicahVittoria) October 4, 2016
*Insert “Watch who you call ugly in middle school” meme with images of Popplio and Brionne here*
— Sexy JJ Costume 🍬 (@Thejourneyman66) October 4, 2016
I need Sun and Moon to get here already. Brionne is a little princess.~❤
— 🎃The SpookyHound🎃 (@CynicalHound) October 4, 2016
There’s certainly plenty of hate for Brionne, but most of it seems to be centered on how “feminine” the evolution looks.
y brionne look like a shitty anime girl
— ☠Spooky 606☠ (@bunsnail) October 4, 2016
Brionne is also pretty cute too, but again, it looks very… female.
— Paratroopa (@WingedNoko) October 4, 2016
For the most part, though, Brionne’s not getting roasted like Popplio did. On the contrary, Brionne’s got many vocal defenders, some of whom have supportively claimed her as a trans girl Pokémon.
The fact that Brionne is always trying to look happy even when sad, but only opens up to ppl they trust, it feels like a huge trans allegory
— Salted Flappuchirpo (@8bit_ghost) October 4, 2016
Brionne is my beautiful daughter I love her and will protect her .
— . ☆ ghoulatobeach 👻 (@gelatobeach) October 4, 2016
anyway brionne is my precious trans grammy award winning child and i love her
— samantha ♭♭ (@doubleflatflat) October 4, 2016
its also good to know that brionne is confirmation that popplio is definitely a trans girl. what a good line
— aunt roy (@lesbianvulpix) October 4, 2016
imagine being that guy who won’t use brionne because it’s too “feminine” and you don’t want to be gay
— year of the bugsy (@spookysiwon) October 4, 2016
Sometimes, the opinions evolve with the Pokémon. Other times, though, it’s just a bigger Litten.
Jay Hathaway is a former senior writer who specialized in internet memes and weird online culture. He previously served as the Daily Dot’s news editor, was a staff writer at Gawker, and edited the classic websites Urlesque and Download Squad. His work has also appeared on nymag.com, suicidegirls.com, and the Morning News.