The noPhone is the gadget you never knew you didn’t need

The next best thing to nothing.

 

Miles Klee

Internet Culture

Published Aug 22, 2014   Updated May 30, 2021, 5:39 pm CDT

We all love fondling our smartphones—too bad they’re so distracting. What if we had an object that occupied idle hands but fulfilled no practical purpose?

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Wonder no longer, and say hello the the noPhone, “a technology-free alternative” to constant contact with pocket-sized computers.

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“With a thin, light, and completely wireless design,” a helpful website explains, the sleek and sturdy noPhone ensures you’ll always “have a rectangle of smooth, cold plastic to clutch without forgoing any potential engagement with your direct environment.” You can’t make calls, but you also won’t experience the clammy horror of feeling “flesh on flesh when closing your hand.” 


 

Needless to say, the noPhone—which also happens to be toilet water-resistant—will disrupt the consumer electronics industry in a way most startups could ever hope to. Why? Because the noPhone is more than a hunk of molded matter that does nothing. It’s a way of life.

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Photo via nophone.eu

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*First Published: Aug 22, 2014, 2:33 pm CDT