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The internet’s favorite porn author, in his own words.
Chuck Tingle, the erotic author who’s captured the internet’s imagination with books like Pounded in the Butt by My Own Butt and Space Raptor Butt Invasion, is now delivering his weird, sexy stories aurally. His new podcast, “Pounded in the Butt by My Own Podcast,” features celebrity guests reading classic Tingle romances starring hunky dinosaurs, unicorns, and all kinds of personified inanimate objects. Tingle answered some burning questions for the Daily Dot ahead of the launch of his show, a collaboration with Welcome to Night Vale producers Night Vale Presents.
For those who aren’t familiar with the phenomenon that is Tingle, here’s a brief refresher: “Dr. Chuck Tingle” is the pseudonym of a man who claims to be a taekwondo master with a Ph.D in massage from DeVry. He’s on the autism spectrum and lives with his son Jon in Billings, Montana. No one knows how much of this is true, though, because Tingle never reveals his face or real name, saying he values his privacy “as a doctor.”
What is indisputable, however, is that Tingle has written dozens of books and created his own fictional metaverse. His stories, called “tinglers,” often break the fourth wall and interact with his own, mysterious life. Tingle’s unique vocabulary can be confusing to the uninitiated: he calls a person’s lifestyle and personality their “way,” his fans are “buckaroos,” his antagonists are “devilmen,” and the ever-present specter of depression is “the lonesome train.” Tingle’s overarching mission is to help people accept themselves and others; to “prove love,” as he often puts it. Opposing him is a dark place called “the Void,” adjacent to the fictional “Tingleverse” and the real world—he’s written an entire book explaining it.
And the glue that holds all of this together is, of course, hot butt-pounding.
The podcast adds a new dimension to Tingle’s elaborate brand of sexy literature: his own beautiful voice. Tingle doesn’t give many audio interviews, but when he does, some journalists feel compelled to prepare their listeners for his unique tone and cadence. The Tingle rhythm can be jarring at first, but once you know his way, you’ll settle into it.
Here’s what Tingle had to say about his new show, love, and the structure of reality as he sees it. These answers are unedited as to preserve Tingle’s unique voice. The first episode of “Pounded in the Butt by My Own Podcast” is available now.
The Daily Dot: What makes 2018 the right time to introduce a Chuck Tingle podcast to the world? What do you hope to accomplish with your podcast that you couldn’t do with books?
Chuck Tingle: Well important thing to remember when you talk on way of BEST TIME is that there is normally no better time than right now for all things. I have learned this by traveling through many timelines and seeing their way because it is easy to think ‘wow I would like to be in timeline where this choice was different like maybe I took a job as a pilot of a handsome plane or maybe I was mean to my bud who was just trying his best’ but this is not always the case. When you go to the timeline with this change there are OTHER THINGS that change with it and it starts to get complicated it never turns out exactly how you think. BEST IDEA IS TO APPRECIATE RIGHT NOW and think how can I prove love in this moment name of THE PRESENT. So when Night Vale buckaroos came to ask if I would like to do a big time show I said yes I would like to seize this day with you and prove love together there is no better time for this because IT IS NOW.
Did you meet any of your guests or any of the Night Vale team in person? (Did they come to Billings? Have they seen your face, or only the mask of MAN OF CHUCK?)
We talk on phones a lot and make big time plans this is with the help of MANAGER (name of friend of son name of Jon) and I enjoy this very much it PUTS A SPRING IN MY TROT thinking wow I’m a real business buckaroo today cant wait to talk the talk and tell everyone to BUY BUY BUY as business is done. Then we talk and talk and they like my way and I like there’s. They are so friendly and kind and nice to work with, but they also respect my privacy as a doctor so we have not met in person, but I would like to do that some day maybe we can fly to their office in town of NIGHT VALE and learn each other’s way.
Will you be writing any new Tinglers specifically for your guests to read? How did you decide who would read which story?
So far guests are choosing from CLASSIC TINGLERS and there are so many to choose from so I think this will be the way of the big time show for a while. We tell big time readers that they can take their pick maybe notice which one makes their hearts’ butt sing or makes love KISS THE SKY. So then when they read they can prove love in their own way because that is so important for message of the show.
How do you feel when you hear a recording of your own voice?
I have recorded my own voice before from my videos and so I am used to the sound but it still sounds strange because IT IS MY VOICE THAT HELPS MY PRIVACY AS A DOCTOR so that is my hidden way. Sometimes I am scared to hear my way and think ‘wow is that you Chuck or are you wearing the skin of another man? is this the story of a reverse twin?’ and then i have to wonder if I am really myself which is something I have had trouble with in he past. When I was a young buckaroo in HOME OF TRUTH UTAH I would look at stars and wonder if I was really here or if this is just my imagination and sometimes this makes the lonesome train call for me, so I try not to think about that way too hard.
Will you have people from your real life on the podcast, like your son Jon, your ex-wife, or Barbara from the frozen lake, or Ted Cobbler? (I guess Ted Cobbler is technically from the void, but you know what I mean, Dr. Tingle.)
In real life others do not want their hidden way to be revealed that is son Jon’s idea because actually I am OKAY with my privacy as a doctor but I keep it hidden because of others around me. So son Jon and KLOWY will not be on the podcast and I have tried to record sweet Barbara talking like frozen marbles but this is impossible as recordings come back empty (this is the way of the frozen lake). Only way DANG TED COBBLER is gonna be on the big time show is if he’s on the news for MOVING THE HECK OUTTA BILLINGS thats what I say. Wish he’d just go away.
Did you do anything special to prepare for the recording process?
Yes, I prepare to record the big time show just like I prepare for writing tinglers which is to wake up and have two big bowls of spaghetti and a glass of chocolate milk then I like to sit on the deck and meditate and I think of my way and how I will prove love today. THIS IS WHERE INSPIRATION STRIKES! Sometimes inspiration says maybe lay low today and keep an eye on Ted Cobbler, or maybe it says go trot over to the park and clap for the basketballs game, BUT SOMETIMES it says write a tingler or make a video where you record yourself as man name of Chuck worlds greatest author. So I think that for the BIG SHOW NAME OF POUNDED IN THE BUTT BY MY OWN PODCAST I will feel moved in this way and then go record in a way that proves love is real.
Do you plan to discuss your nonfiction philosophical works on the show, e.g. topics related to romance or politics or the void?
Yes, I will discuss many things on this big time show that is my job as host (this is like SKULLMAN in TALES FROM THE BASEMENT where he tells jokes over a dang bubbling caldren I don’t know looks too scary to watch but I like the start of the show that was my favorite part). I will talk in this way and comment on THE NEWS or POLITICS or STARS WAR MOVIE or maybe what’s happening in Billings maybe talk about wearing a 2 ply crabsuit if you go to the lake this season.
Who’s your dream guest to have on the show, and what tingler would you like them to read?
Top guest is CHANNING TATUM reading I’M GAY FOR MY LIVING BILLIONAIRE JET PLANE there are nearby timelines where this has happened and it was a TOP HIT so I would like that to happen on this timeline too we’ll see. Also Toms Hank would be a good one he is handsome but now I am thinking in this way and my mind is RILED UP thinking on all the nice readers maybe a fellow writer like STEPHENS KING or R L STIMES (writer of hit stories IM SCARED OF BEES NOW WHAT THE HECK? and WELCOME TO MY THEME PARK ITS SHAPED LIKE A MONSTER).
Speaking of the void, what is the relationship between the void, the Tingleverse, and the “real world?” Can you draw us a diagram or something so we can understand better?
This is important topic for all buckaroos to learn as HANDSOME SCIENTISTS so I will explain as best I can if it is easier please imagine a shirtless scientist with a clipboard telling you this (he also wears glasses because he is smart). All timelines are stacked on top of each other like a tube just going up and down forever because there are INFINITE TIMELINES this is because every option that has ever happened or will happened separates a timeline THIS IS WHY YOU ARE SO IMPORTANT because every choice you make every day creates a new reality (wow you are so powerful and special) but also there is a TOP LAYER and a BOTTOM later so even though it is infinite in between there is a highest level of a tingleverse and a lowest level. THIS LAYER is considered the top layer but this is debatable some say it all depends on your perspective but I am not sure. Some say it’s close to the top but there are clues saying that is a false way. We do not know but top scientists are working on this way. Outside of these layers is THE VOID this is where everything that lies outside of reality lives mostly its just empty but there are also various COSMIC HORRORS and DEVILS so it is best to not think on this place. Sometimes reverse twins will travel through timelines and they are not always bad but there are some that get stuck in pockets of THE VOID who get greater void madness and have a bad way. Then they try to steal your bones or your skin so they can replace you or sometimes it’s because there is no skin on their timeline and they want to try it out.
I made diagram in book CHUCK’S COMPLETE GUIDE TO THE VOID so I will attach this in a file. Please note it is slightly outdated as it was once thought that the tingleverse became gayer towards lower layers but it is now known that it becomes more SEXUALLY FLUID regardless of gender combinations or maybe no gender at all so that is big point of scientific progress. Also it is important to understand that we have learned that EVEN THOUGH THE LONESOME TRAIN HAS A STATION LOCATED IN THE VOID it is not OF the void and this is important to remember. even though it can be scary the lonesome train can take you to other places that are less scary and actually very nice it just depends on the situation this is something I have learned about myself and my relationship with the lonesome train.
Do you have any plans to write an autobiography about your life in this timeline?
Yes, I would like to write this book one day probably when the lonesome train is calling loud in my ears and I am about to leave this timeline. I think before I board this train I will take off my mask of Chuck and say this is me I was really Tonys Clifton the whole time (he is old time comedy man and singer) or maybe I will take off my mask of Chuck and say I AM REALLY A COMPUTER AND NOW I MUST RIDE THIS TRAIN so those are two possibilities.
Online seems to have been very good and healthy for you, but it seems to be depressing and unhealthy for many (maybe most?) people. What’s your advice to people when the internet makes them sad?
Well first thing’s first IT IS OKAY TO BE SAD. This is very important thing to remember and it is easy to forget but being sad on some days is a normal part of life! YOU ARE OKAY AND THAT IS NORMAL. But then if you are always feelings sad you have to think maybe I need some help in this way maybe I can talk to someone and tell them the way that I feel so that is important too. But good thing to remind yourself as a buckaroo is that LOVE IS REAL it is the one constant on all layers of the tingleverse! That is very exciting because that means that there are SO MANY THINGS THAT WILL COME AND GO, BUT LOVE WILL STAY and this thought makes me happy when I am having a bad day. I think it is also important to remember how special you are to this timeline and to the buckaroos around you, because every choice you make IMPACTS them more than you well ever know it creates whole dang universes! So you are so powerful and so infinitely important, and even by me saying this and you reading this we have connected and created infinite timelines and if thats not DANG SPECIAL then I don’t know what is.
Do you foresee a time when you’ll want to retire from writing tinglers and try out other hobbies (or other ways to prove love?)
I will never retire from writing tinglers because this is my favorite way to prove love and if I ever get to busy I can just head to another timeline for years and write and write and write then come back here and only two minutes have gone by, so it is a good way for me to get things done. I do like other hobbies I like trotting to the park with SON NAME OF JON and KLOWY and I like to talk to the neighborhood birds and sometimes I like to feel like a big timer on an interview like this! So that is my way. But also TOP JOB of man name of Chuck is to be a proud dad and I am so proud of Jon. Hope I can be like him one day but when I think of the man he has become it makes me feel that I have already accomplished more than I could ever hope because he is such an amazing person and he treats everyone with respect and I like that very much.
What would you say to fans who are convinced Chuck Tingle is a pseudonym for another writer (or a group of writers)?
Well, Chuck Tingle is not my real name so this theory is true story. THIS IS TO PROTECT MY PRIVACY AS A DOCTOR and is very important. But I also think that sometimes it is sad when buckaroos say ‘oh this must be a bunch of people one person could not write all this’ because they believe THEY could not write all of this! They do not believe in themselves BUT I BELIEVE IN THEM so much I know in my heart’s butt that they could write twice as much as me if they wanted so I hope maybe one of those skeptical buckaroos will read this and go out and write their own book that proves love is real.
Jay Hathaway is a former senior writer who specialized in internet memes and weird online culture. He previously served as the Daily Dot’s news editor, was a staff writer at Gawker, and edited the classic websites Urlesque and Download Squad. His work has also appeared on nymag.com, suicidegirls.com, and the Morning News.