Do you ever run out of coffee while you’re on “the go,” and wish you had a portable brewing device that looks like a copper pipe, so you can enjoy freshly brewed coffee while looking like an old-timey steampunk smoker? Of course you don’t. But Bripe exists anyway, and Weird Twitter is mystified by it.
Podcaster and good tweeter Mark Popham brought Bripe to the internet’s attention Tuesday morning, and the reaction was 50 shades of “What the f**k?” The product bills itself as a “portable coffee brew pipe,” but many struggled to understand what that means and why it’s supposed to be good.
holy shit you all I do not understand BRIPE at all pic.twitter.com/TrxdS6dlEb— jd vance's "holler aunt" (@markpopham) September 12, 2017
"When you want to look like you're ripping a bongload, but you're just having some coffee: BRIPE"— Keith Maniac, from Guatemala (@CutItOutPutin) September 12, 2017
Oh god, it took me way to long to figure out that it's a portmanteau of brewing pipe....— pie Ali mode (@wisdomstatement) September 12, 2017
The Bripe website is “briping.com,” implying that “Bripe” is supposed to be a verb, like the much-maligned “vape.” But vapes at least have an advantage over traditional cigarettes. What does Bripe have over, say, a travel mug? Or a coffee shop? Well, here’s one possibility:https://twitter.com/Mattzors/status/907607946590396416
Sold. I will take one of your finest artisanal Bripes, please.
Seriously, though: There have been some positive reviews of the Bripe, although the process for portable brewing coffee seems complicated and easy to screw up. The last thing I want to do before I’ve had my coffee is operate a handheld torch. But if you’re hanging out by a waterfall in the jungle with no other way to get your caffeine fix, you’ll probably wish you had one.
Despite his bemusement at the Bripe’s existence, Popham thinks he might want one. At the very least, he’s offering to give it a fair review.
okay let me say this: if anyone on earth is going to use a Bripe it will be me. I am 100% the target audience for Bripe.— jd vance's "holler aunt" (@markpopham) September 12, 2017
what I'm saying is if I were sent a Bripe I would review it fairly and honestly.— jd vance's "holler aunt" (@markpopham) September 12, 2017
Please send him one, Bripe founders. Weird Twitter demands answers to its burning Bripe questions.