She whined, he dined.
We wouldn’t wish crossing paths with a hungry bear on any kayaker, but that’s exactly what happened to Mary Maley in a video she recorded in Southeast Alaska.
The video, by turns excruciating and hilarious, documents a lengthy encounter with a curious bear. Maley preemptively thanks a bear for not eating her kayak—just moments before he turns around to make her only form of transportation his lunch.
The strange sequence of events makes it unclear who we should empathize with. Should we pity Maley, who threatens the bear with pepper spray and finally pleads “Bear, please stop breaking my things. It’s not even food, it’s doesn’t even taste good”? Or shall we take the side of the bear who possesses a somewhat adorable devil-may-care attitude as he calmly destroys Maley’s kayak?
Perhaps the true victim here is the Internet viewing audience, who must bear the sound of Maley’s voice for the entire duration of the video. You brave souls—our thoughts are with you.