apple watch piss

Illustration by Max Fleishman

It's waterproof, but that water has to go somewhere.

While everyone's busy overhyping the panic about Apple's new iPhone eliminating the headphone jack, an even more shocking and "courageous" development isn't getting the attention it deserves. The new Apple Watch Series 2 will be able to piss on you. 

The. Watch. Can. Piss. 

Or, at least, that's how people are describing the waterproof watch's ability to "eject" liquid through its speakerholes: 

The Apple Watch 2's big selling point is that it's "swimproof," but water that gets in has to go somewhere, lest it damage the components. And where it goes could be "on you," if you're into that sort of thing (that thing being computer piss). 

Some people are thinking bigger than just H20, though: 

We've seen a sports watch before, but Apple's watersports watch is a definite innovation. What would Steve Jobs think, though?

Don't care! We're mere weeks away from the first video of someone actually trying this, and I can't wait.
Promoted Stories Powered by Sharethrough
Dude claims he accidentally pissed on a toddler because of Pokémon Go
A lot of messed-up things have happened to Pokémon Go players since the game debuted—the combination of engrossing gameplay and walking around in the real world seems to invite disaster, up to and including stepping off a cliff . But no incident yet has been as embarrassing as one man's tale of playing Pokémon while trying to hold in his pee .
From Our VICE Partners

Pure, uncut internet. Straight to your inbox.

Thanks for subscribing to our newsletter!