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I’ll never see Hans Zimmer the same way again.
The other night, I decided that I wanted to hear the Star Wars theme.
Luckily, here in the Internet age, desires like these can be sated with a couple clicks in your favorite music streaming service. I pulled up Spotify and typed the name of our relevant composer hero, John Williams, into the search bar. This took me to his profile page.
Once I arrived, I was confronted with a vision from hell.
HOLY SHIT, JOHN, DON’T SCARE ME LIKE THAT. Seriously, what is going on here? Whoever was building John Williams’ Spotify page must have realized that they were making a friendly old man look like some sort of horrible dark wizard. I didn’t know true emptiness until I stared deep into the eyes of the guy who made the Indiana Jones music.
So is this terrifying phenomenon exclusive to John Williams? Is this an aberration? Or do other composers have equally haunting Spotify pages?
OK, I need some time alone. And maybe an Enya album.
Entertainment and sports reporter Luke Winkie has written everywhere from A.V Club to Vice, including Sports Illustrated, Rolling Stone, Kotaku, Playboy, Mel, and Polygon.