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Store manager hilariously narrates security footage of shoplifting seagull
The perfect crime this was not.
Seagulls are known throughout the world as loud, obnoxious pests—and it turns out they’re not above breaking the law, either.
One of the sea birds recently strutted into the Sweet News store in the Scottish city of Aberdeen, pecked at a piece of fruit, and attempted to shoplift a packet of peanuts. But manager Zaman Iqbal wasn’t having it, and he did everything short of having the feathered fellow arrested to protect his stock. Bonus points to this guy for slipping a “deez nuts” reference into his amazing security footage narration.
When will one of these beaky burglars be brought to justice?
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'