- A lonely grandma sought family to spend Christmas with on Craigslist Saturday 5:45 PM
- Airbnb bans white supremacists tied to Iron March forum Saturday 5:07 PM
- Did a Twitter user really get tricked into naming baby ‘Jack Ingof’? Saturday 4:46 PM
- State of emergency declared in New Orleans following ‘cyberattack’ Saturday 4:12 PM
- Video shows boy getting beat up–mom says it’s because he wore MAGA hat Saturday 3:54 PM
- Billboard changing albums chart to count YouTube streams Saturday 2:43 PM
- TikTok’s 20 most popular songs of 2019 Saturday 2:14 PM
- Greek gods memes are flooding Reddit thanks to TV reboot rumors Saturday 1:47 PM
- Anti-impeachment protesters aimlessly fumble through halls of Congress Saturday 12:54 PM
- Everything we know so far about the Xbox Series X Saturday 12:17 PM
- ASMR YouTuber Life with MaK says she was branded a ‘Nazi’ by online smear campaign Saturday 10:46 AM
- Voters duped by fake ex-Bloomberg intern’s tweet about being fired Saturday 9:47 AM
- HBO’s ‘Watchmen’ and the fantasy of competence Saturday 8:00 AM
- Cómo ver Kamaru Usman vs. Colby Covington en el UFC 245 Saturday 7:00 AM
- ‘Penis fish’ memes erupt after worms wash up on California coast Friday 5:58 PM
An updated Internet slang guide for the FBI
Wait till they get their hands on the first dude to tweet “IADMACTAAGI.”
The FBI has published a list of Twitter shorthand that includes BTDTGTTSAWIO (“been there, done that, got the T-shirt and wore it out”), IITYWTMWYBMAD (“if I tell you what this means will you buy me a drink?”), and PMYHMFSWGAD (“pardon me, you have mistaken me for someone who gives a damn”).
TL;DR: Someone’s been seriously messing with the FBI.
In that spirit, we note that they missed these important, commonly used, definitely real Twitter expressions.
ROFLMAOADAIED: Rolling on the floor laughing my ass off and detonating an improvised explosive device
BITEG: Boy, isn’t tax evasion great?
IADMACTAAGI: I am definitely making a credible threat against a government institution
B|>: I am the Unabomber
0B)>: Despite looking like the Unabomber, I am a well-intentioned and law-abiding person
BRBGHMBSAW: Be right back, gotta help my buddies stockpile automatic weapons
WCCITBCC: White-collar crime is the best collar crime
IANALBIAANAPOIFFI: I am not a lawyer, but I am also not a person of interest for federal investigations
IITYWTMWYBMAHPOF: If I tell you what this means will you buy me a hundred pounds of fertilizer?
NOTALLMEN: I have unexamined violent tendencies
UASTCTCTBUBTFBIHHS: Using a secret Twitter code too clever to be understood by the Federal Bureau of Investigations, ha ha, suckers
NSFWUYLMAITM: Not safe for work unless you, like me, are in the Mafia
IKLP: I killed Laura Palmer
TBDCTTATEL: Too busy doing crimes to type all these extra letters
Photo via SeemingLee/Flickr (CC BY 2.0)
Jess Zimmerman is the editor-in-chief of Electric Lit, and her byline has previously appeared in the Guardian, the Washington Post, New York Magazine, Vice, Slate, Refinery29, and many other outlets. She's the co-author of Basic Witches: How To Summon Success, Banish Drama, And Raise Hell With Your Coven.