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- How to live stream Devin Haney vs. Antonio Moran on DAZN Saturday 7:00 AM
- Trump’s transphobic policies are disgusting—but they aren’t new Saturday 6:30 AM
- How to watch the Copa del Rey Final online for free Saturday 5:45 AM
- How to watch the DFB-Pokal final for free Saturday 5:30 AM
- Curvy Wife Guy drops music video for rap song ‘Chubby Sexy’ Friday 7:33 PM
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- Kanye West appears on David Letterman’s Netflix show to talk Trump, TMZ, and Drake Friday 3:27 PM
Dude on local news is completely unfazed after being shot in the chest
‘A little, petty wound.’
Devon Hawkins said he was relaxing as usual at home in Quincy, Illinois, when a stray bullet came through a window and struck him in the chest—and his immediate thought was not of himself, but his son’s safety.
It could have been just another sadly unremarkable incident in gun-addicted America were it not for the fact that Hawkins later that same night spoke to a local news correspondent about it, embodying an almost supernatural chill as he explained that he wasn’t “trippin'” about the “little, petty wound” he suffered in the shootout.
What would it take for Hawkins to lose his effortless poise? We sincerely hope to never find out.
Screengrab via KHQA/YouTube
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'