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This guy’s standards are impossibly low, even for Craigslist

"Education, ambition, worldliness and all of that is completely unnecessary."


Fidel Martinez

Internet Culture

Posted on Jun 12, 2013   Updated on Jun 1, 2021, 1:35 pm CDT

One New Yorker has turned to Craigslist—the best resource for finding an apartment, a couch, or even tickets to a sold out show—in search of messed up, beautiful true love.

Last Thursday, an unidentified man in his mid-20s posted a personal ad in the Missed Connections portion of the New York City edition of Craigslist. “Looking for a relationship with some serious quirks: Fat? No friends?” the unknown poster asked.

The ad then goes into great detail—750 words, to be exact—on what kind of person the author of the post is looking for. In short, he’s looking for anything and everything most “normal people” aren’t.

“I like outsiders who have really weird interests,” he notes.

“If your idea of a good weekend is staying in watching the weirdest, sickest horror films out there, that’s cool to me. If your idea of a good weekend is studying your anatomy textbooks in the hopes of becoming a mortician, that’s cool too. If your idea of a good weekend is painting endless pictures of wildflowers in your 75-ft “studio” with no natural light, that’s cool. If your idea of a good weekend is driving all day and night to the most random place to see what it smells like there, that’s cool.”

Sounds like something straight out of a Todd Solondz movie.

“Education, ambition, worldliness and all of that is completely unnecessary,” he adds, just in case it wasn’t apparent enough how low his bar is.

“Really, I just want a lonely boy who needs me, and loves me so much that his disordered brain can’t think of much else. If I tell you to go get me the ocean, you bring it back one little teaspoon at a time if that’s all you’ve got.”

Before you write off the author of this Craigslist ad as twisted and psychotic, consider the fact that love itself is twisted and psychotic. There’s no real rhyme, reason, or logic to it. It’s irrational, messy, and complex. There’s something refreshing and oddly touching about someone dropping all pretenses and truly putting themselves out there.

Photo via Matthew Oliphant/Flickr

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*First Published: Jun 12, 2013, 5:20 pm CDT