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Photo via T.Tseng/Flickr (CC-BY)
The nerve of this guy.
Twenty years ago, if someone had suggested using a muffin tin to serve condiments at a cookout, or told you that a dab of nail polish would help you identify similar-looking keys, this would have been called a “tip.” If the person was feeling grandiose, they’d call it a “clever idea.” Now these simple bits of advice are known as “life hacks,” as if they somehow contain the key to immortality.
And many so-called life hacks are just offloading your problems to other people. For example Josh Williams of California asked Twitter if he was brilliant for making an employee at Chipotle individually package each ingredient of his burrito—so he could assemble it himself when he got home.
Started asking the folks at Chipotle to individually package my ingredients so I can assemble it all at home.
Am I weird? Or brilliant? pic.twitter.com/OUXbJH3c7g
— Josh Williams (@jw) July 3, 2017
The answer from Twitter was a resounding “no.”
Neither. To the people you're making do this, you're just an annoying customer
— Patrick Schmidt (@PatrickASchmidt) July 4, 2017
not brilliant, just inconvenient to the workers who are already stressed out of their mind
— WhatInBadSyncapation (@Queen_of_Bread) July 3, 2017
Those poor kids dont get paid enough for this shit
— me (@plentyofpapers) July 3, 2017
Let us not forget that this was probably also a pain in the ass for the people waiting in line to order a burrito like a normal human being.
person behind you in line gotta be hot pic.twitter.com/zEUgRbsW05
— E (@MackHardRd) July 3, 2017
Other people pointed out that this was also a ridiculous waste of plastic.
— Obi-Wan Kenobi (@SirBenKenobi) July 4, 2017
This kind of reaction is to be expected any time you’re making your life easier at the expense of others. If you actually think this is a great idea, here are a few other life hacks you might enjoy:
- To save gas put your car in neutral and let the driver behind you push.
- Avoid a costly divorce by not telling your wife about the affair.
- Feeling claustrophobic on the bus? Stop holding in that uncomfortable flatulence.
Williams noticed the negative reaction, but seems to live by the old adage “any publicity is good publicity.”
10 years later I finally found the secret to Twitter engagement. pic.twitter.com/R7xRe7BSB3
— Josh Williams (@jw) July 3, 2017
Although, if a tweet calling you an asshole has over three and a half times as many likes as your original post, it might be time to rethink that philosophy.
I wildly inconvieneced a minimum wage employee in a crowded line because I don't understand the concept of grocery stores, am I a genius https://t.co/l2TR8XhMnL
— 「Ellie-Marie ★」 (@WitchHats) July 4, 2017
Which might just be what happened.
I've learned a lot today folks. Top 3:
1. Chipotle Twitter is lit
2. I am what the kids call "extra af"
3. Line workers deserve more tips
— Josh Williams (@jw) July 4, 2017
David Britton is a writer and comedian based in Rhinebeck, New York who focuses on internet culture, memes, and viral news stories. He also writes for the Hard Times and is the creator of StoriesAboutWizards.com.