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In all the shock and confusion over the U.K. vote to leave the European Union last week, you may have missed some relevant tweets from woke celebrity Lindsay Lohan. She’s since deleted her furious attacks on the “Leave” camp, but she had some harsh words for the town of Kettering, in central England, which had high turnout and opted for the Brexit.
It could surprise exactly no one in the U.S. that Lohan—an often volatile and troubled Hollywood figure—had no prior knowledge of a Northamptonshire borough of some 80,000 people. But Kettering’s convervative member of parliament, Philip Hollobone, who has represented the district since 2005, would not permit the slight.
Which is presumably why, instead of addressing Brexit’s manifold disastrous consequences in a session of parliament, he took some precious moments to fire back at a foreign actress who mainly stars in tabloids.
This is a fantastic glimpse of democracy in action. A couple of things, though:
- Lindsay Lohan has definitely never heard of Weetabix cereal, and would probably think it’s a fictional brand from Harry Potter.
- It’s hard to imagine her not scoffing in disgust at boots from Loakes or Cheaneys, which have that “I like to kiss my horse on the lips” feel.
- Your local football team doesn’t deserve to be dragged into this.
Finally, Mr. Hollobone, we might point out the dire riskiness of inviting Lohan to come switch on Kettering’s Christmas lights, because when she accepts the honor and shows up to do it, you’re gonna be like:
via SpongeBob SquarePants
Don’t say we didn’t warn you.
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'