- Here’s why you shouldn’t buy a Nintendo Switch until mid-August Monday 5:11 PM
- Man blasted for making his coworkers babysit his child Monday 5:07 PM
- Pete Buttigieg’s country radio interview was blocked from the air Monday 4:35 PM
- 15-year-old Smash Bros. prodigy caught using racist slur in private Discord server Monday 3:47 PM
- Instagram users who post pet pictures more likely to get hacked Monday 3:45 PM
- Post-Prime Day recap: Shipping delays, more sales, and a scam Monday 3:08 PM
- Jacob Wohl returns to Twitter … for now Monday 1:56 PM
- How to stream WWE Raw Reunion Monday 1:35 PM
- ‘I hope Trump deports you’: Woman goes on racist rant to Spanish speakers at a store Monday 1:24 PM
- Emoji Mashup Bot gives life to unidentifiable emotions Monday 1:15 PM
- Notorious grifter Anna Sorokin reportedly blocked from profiting off Netflix series Monday 12:45 PM
- Charlottesville attacker’s Twitter account included praise for Hitler Monday 12:10 PM
- ‘Short Treks’ trailer: Spock, Pike, and Number One return Monday 11:57 AM
- Everything we know about ‘Star Trek: Lower Decks,’ the new animated show Monday 11:55 AM
- Cole Carrigan says he left Team 10 after being called homophobic slur Monday 11:32 AM
Let’s start with the obvious: Don’t try to jump over subway tracks. Ever. It’s further than it looks and it could have dire consequences, endangering not only your life but also those who inevitably have to hop onto the rails to help you get out before the next train rolls through.
And if you just can’t resist, at least dress appropriately: Get some running shoes on and shed a few of those extra winter layers. Otherwise, you’ll end up like this poor woman who believed she could fly but found out that, alas, she cannot.
That thud… that’s the sound of complete and total failure.
Austin Powell is the former managing editor of the Daily Dot. His work focuses on the intersection of entertainment and technology. He previously served as a music columnist for the Austin Chronicle and is the co-author of The Austin Chronicle Music Anthology.