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Viral video of wedding vows are criticized for their crudeness–but the bride defends them

Even the groom's mother admonished him for them.


Michelle Jaworski

Internet Culture

Posted on Mar 30, 2023   Updated on Mar 30, 2023, 3:05 pm CDT

Wedding vows can be anything you want them to be: Funny, heartfelt or even full of inside jokes that maybe only three people fully understand. But one groom’s vows have gone viral because of how he spoke about the woman he was about to marry—and the bride is defending them.

Last week, Jonathan Pajak, a wedding photographer and videographer, shared a clip from a wedding he shot. He introduced the clip by including a snippet of the groom, whose name is Michael, saying, “I hope we have a lot of sex” when asked what he wanted to say to his future bride, and noting that he should’ve been prepared to see the vows.

The clip, which only showed a portion of Michael’s vows (he would later post his full vows on TikTok), opened with him openly referring to their sex life.

“Only two things are required to keep me happy: Keep my belly full and my balls empty,” he said as the crowd gasped. “Though you’re amazing at half of it, we really need to get you some cooking lessons.”

@lensculture You’re not gonna believe what he said in his vows! #weddingvows #groomsvows #ohhno #brideandgroom #weddingbloopers #weddingceremony #vowsgonewrong ♬ Full Heart Empty Balls – Jonathan Pajak

The groom continued with backhanded compliments (he would never love anyone more unless he got the chance to meet Margot Robbie) and crass language—he gave his wife a choice about how their night would end. As Michael recited his vows, the bride laughed, covered her face with her vows, and scrunched her face as he kissed the air. The officiant, who at one point, responded with a stern “Michael!” eventually interjected.

“Being that I am his mom, I will deal with him later,” the officiant said. “He is grounded. By all means.”

The initial clip blew up, and it’s since been viewed more than 22 million times; clips and duets of the vows have similarly gone viral on Twitter. And many people who’ve watched Pajak’s initial TikTok are horrified at how the groom spoke about the woman he was marrying and said all of that in front of their friends and family.

“I could not even FATHOM my future person diminishing me in that way,” one person commented. “Like not one single thing about who she is was said. It’s disheartening.”

“Me and my husband have this sense of humor together,” another wrote. “but our wedding vows? I’d be mortified.”

Due to popular demand, Pajak posted Michael’s full vows. While the jokes are still there—and the quip about their wedding night only occurs at the end—Michael calls Lentini his soulmate and tells her the only thing that’ll change for them after they got married is that he’ll have to get used to wearing a ring on his hand. 

@lensculture Replying to @jasmine.sills Here is the full version for those requesting it! @fishcatcher777 #weddingvows #groomsvows #ohhno #brideandgroom #weddingbloopers #vowsgonewrong #weddingceremony #videographer ♬ original sound – Jonathan Pajak

“Everyone keeps telling me that marriage is going to ruin a lot of things, but I feel that’s only if you let it,” Michael said. “Even if we fight, argue, or don’t see eye-to-eye on something, it’ll never affect the way I love you.”

Eventually, Destiny Lentini, the bride in the video, weighed in and dismissed people who called her husband’s wedding vows a red flag.

“So im the bride [and] no this isn’t a red flag🙃,” Lentini commented on Pajak’s original video. “we have been together for 10 years now and decided to get married right before our 10th year.”

She also made her own response to the viral vows video, assuring people that, yes, she is happy—and married—and wouldn’t change a thing. And not only that, but she loved his vows.

“I’ve seen people say we have a toxic relationship and that we aren’t gonna last and this and that, and honestly, you can say what you want,” she said. “I know you’re wrong because I actually know my relationship, and I know myself, and I know Michael. So I’m sorry if you’re just not that happy. It’s your life.”

@destiny010513 so about the wedding vows that have gone viral on tictok🤣🤣🤣 sorry not sorry #foryoupage #weddingvow  #haterswillbehaters  #bride  #wedding  #itiswhatitis  #happywifehappylife  #comical  #sorrynotsorry #sweetdreams ♬ original sound – Destiny Lentini

It’s true that people might not be getting the full picture of a relationship being scrutinized based on a snippet of a couple’s wedding vows. But based on the reception to subsequent videos from the wedding posted by Pajak and Lentini, the initial impression has been hard to shake off.

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*First Published: Mar 30, 2023, 3:04 pm CDT