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The stylish alternative to the tinfoil hat has finally arrived
Now your friends won’t know how crazy you are.
We all know how annoying it is having signals beamed into your brain all day, but it’s equally annoying to hear your friends and co-workers snicker at your tinfoil hat.
Finally, there’s a solution. Two cousins have designed a hat that is not only stylish but will keep Wi-Fi waves from getting into your tender brain meat. It’s called “SHIELD,” and Nick Fury himself couldn’t do a better job of keeping your head safe.
The SHIELD Kickstarter even provides detailed, highly scientific diagrams to show how the hat works:
But if these graphics aren’t enough to convince you, the inventors provide a more detailed description:
We know that we need to say something more about the technology and design to grab your attention and trust, so here we go. To achieve the signal proof quality we use unique fabric (pure silver) which is 100% antimicrobial, antiodor, washable and was originally produced for military purposes and we put it between the hat`s layers.
For a $33 contribution ($35 if you want the baseball cap) you can have the peace of mind that comes from knowing that, while the entire rest of your body is hopelessly exposed, the top part of your head is safe from microwave ovens and lamps.
Oh, and don’t forget to buy one for your baby.
You do care about your baby… don’t you?
David Britton is a writer and comedian based in Rhinebeck, New York who focuses on internet culture, memes, and viral news stories. He also writes for the Hard Times and is the creator of StoriesAboutWizards.com.