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Don’t let the government shutdown stop you from picking up hotties
If you really want to know if a major political event is really happening, turn off your TV and check Twitter.
The only good part of today’s potential-government-shutdown madness is the hashtag #shutdownpickuplines. People have been tweeting sexy ways to pick up a new boo using topical political humor. Since many employees will be off work, many of these revolve around using that free time… really well. Others are focused on the National Zoo’s panda cam, which would go dark during a shutdown. Let’s face it, that would be a disaster.
If you really want to know if a major political event is really happening, turn off your TV and check Twitter. Or just refresh this site over and over: istheusgovernmentshutdown.com.
1) Sexy Panda Cam
They may be shutting off the panda cam but I have another cam we can use tonight #ShutdownPickupLines
— beccagrawl (@beccagrawl) September 30, 2013
2) Shutdown puns
Are you furloughnsome tonight? #ShutdownPickupLines
— delrayser (@delrayser) September 30, 2013
3) Sad truths
“Can I buy you a drink? Just kidding. I’m not getting paid this month.” #ShutdownPickupLines
— Jesse Berney (@jesseberney) September 30, 2013
4) Hey girl.
Unlike some branches of government, I will always listen to you. #shutdownpickuplines
— Ari Melber (@AriMelber) September 30, 2013
5) Yogi Bear with me
Hey, Park Ranger, what are you doing tomorrow? #ShutdownPickupLines
— Delia (@DeliaCabe) September 30, 2013
6) How sweet
Baby, I let the government shut down, so I could spend the whole day with you #ShutdownPickupLines
— Matt Vasilogambros (@MattVas) September 30, 2013
7) Gross but great
Let’s see if some backdoor negotiations can help move things along #shutdownpickuplines
— John Simpson (@jsimpsonftw) September 30, 2013
Why don’t we sequester ourselves in the bedroom… #shutdownpickuplines
— Mary Fuller (@maryinzambia) September 30, 2013
9) Boehner joke +1
Upset at the speaker? I know one boehner that can please you all shutdown long. #ShutdownPickupLines
— Ben Carlos (@SoBendito) September 30, 2013
10) Check. Mate.
— Lathaniel Cooper (@lathaniel) September 30, 2013
Photo via Tom Lohdan/Flickr
Gaby Dunn is an actress, comedian, and blogger who covered YouTube for the Daily Dot. Since 2016, she’s hosted the podcast ‘Bad with Money,’ and operates a successful YouTube channel. Her writing has appeared in the New York Times, the Boston Globe, Vice, and Salon.