man walking with a suitcase attached to his butt

Screengrab via Robert Lian / Youtube

Party up front, business in the rear.

It’s pretty hard to look cool wearing a fanny pack (unless you’re The Rock and it’s the 1980’s)

So how much less cool are you going to look carrying an entire suitcase on your ass?

The answer is this much less cool:

Meet the device whose creator, Robert Lian, is calling “My Hitch” and New York Magazine is calling “The Butt Suitcase”

Perhaps the saddest part of the commercial comes when Lian tells us, “I’ve walked for miles like this.” He fails to add “and I’m always alone for some reason.”

The truth is it does seem somewhat practical. After all, Lian is a pilot. It’s not like he doesn’t have a lot of experience carrying bags through the airport. Still, it seems like convenience comes at too high a price for most of us this time.

Lian has clearly reached the age where he doesn’t have to give a shit what anyone thinks of him—or as as Viagra calls it, “The age of knowing how to make things happen.” Meanwhile, the rest of us will probably keep rolling our suitcase with one hand while we give the people hauling their Hitches through the airport pitying (but secretly envious) glances.

H/T NYmag

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