A “cowboy, a curmudgeon, a biker and a normal guy” walked into an Idaho Gubernatorial Debate on Wednesday and gave us the best political viewing since Jimmy McMillan. Over the hour long hustings for the Republican Party nomination, the beauty that is democracy played out in front of the audience as the primary candidates for governor debated policy.
Standing next to leaders Gov. Butch Otter and Sen. Russ Fulcher were Harley Brown and Walt Bayes. Otter and Fulcher are likely lamenting the decision to let the long shot candidates on the stage, as almost all the media attention has been dedicated to what came out of Brown and Bayes’ mouths.
Brown is a biker, and came to the debate dressed in leathers with a pocket filled with cigars, and he promptly declared God had ordained him to become commander-in-chief. Bayes is an anti-abortion platform perennial candidate who once went to jail for homeschooling his 16 children.
Brown, who “has a master’s in raising hell,” spent most of the evening discussing the fact that bikers get pulled over “like a Playboy Bunny wearing a miniskirt gets hit on all the time,” and regularly told the other candidates to “belay that.” Meanwhile, Bayes declared his intentions “to take Idaho back from the federal government,” and used his closing statement to warn us of the approaching “End Times.”
Luckily, someone has made a supercut of the greatest quotes from the evening. These two candidates will likely now join McMillian and other heroes like Vermine Supreme in the Longshot Candidate Hall of Fame.