6 ways a Donald Trump presidency could actually be good

illustration of donald trump

Illustration via Max Fleishman

It’s not all bad.

Donald Trump could very well be the the 45th President of the United States and you know what? It wouldn’t actually be that bad. Here’s why.

1) America will be great again

Everyone knows that America, right now, is the complete opposite of great. Way back when, America was a land where dreams were made of and a place of rich opportunity and prosperity. In 2016, America is not great at all. Donald Trump will make the country what it needs to be again: great. Obviously he’s the only one that knows how to do this.

2) Your racist cousins will get to be racist in public

Not only is Donald Trump sexist, but he has a hard time seeing things from the perspective of anyone who’s not orange. He is the perfect candidate for your backwards-thinking cousin who wants to build a border wall, dislikes Obama, and wants America to be great again. Donald Trump brings all the racists to the yard, and your cousin will finally have an open community in which to express his ignorant frustrations.

3) People will finally move to Canada

They’ve been talking about moving to Canada for years, and if Donald Trump makes it to the White House, extreme Trump haters can do just that. Sure, record deportations and extreme police brutality have been plaguing the country for years and they still didn’t move to Canada—but never mind that. Donald Trump becoming president would definitely be the straw that broke the camel’s back. (The camel represents not moving to Canada.)

4) Melania Trump will be the First Lady

No one knows exactly what Melania Trump does, and if she becomes the First Lady of the United States, we can finally find out.

5) There will be another civil war

A civil war hasn’t happened here in years. But now that Donald Trump is that much closer to being the ruler of the free world (lol), we might as well have another. A war in this country would somehow make America great again. Let that idea ruminate for a minute.

6) Melania Trump will be deported

Donald seems to have a problem with immigrants, so if he becomes president, Slovenian immigrant Melania’s days here are numbered. 

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