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‘Once one of them quits, you realize you weren’t actually friends. just proximity acquaintances’: Workers say it’s weird when you see a co-worker after they quit

‘Literally THE DAY AFTER, they already had inside jokes without me.’

Photo of P.J. West

P.J. West

worker speaking on couch with caption 'have you ever quit your job and then interacted with your old coworkers' (l) worker speaking on couch with caption 'and no matter what you do' (c) worker speaking on couch with caption 'like the interactions are just not the same' (r)

A TikToker went to the platform to talk about the awkwardness that happens between former co-workers once one person leaves that job … and it’s resonating to the degree that it’s beginning to get stitched.

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The original video comes from creator @allietripaldi, getting more than 261,000 views since going up on Feb. 27. In it, she muses on what it’s like to quit your job and realize life with your co-workers—well, now your former co-workers—is forever changed.

“Have you ever quit your job and then interacted with your old co-workers?” she begins. “I just think it’s wild that humans can create these little mini-societies. And one day you’re just like, um, I have decided to formally leave said society. And they’re like, ‘OK, sounds good, bye.’ And you’re like, ‘Bye,’ and no matter what you do, your interactions with those people in that group at that company will never be the same.”

@allietripaldi Just Monday musings #quitting #workforce #mondaymood ♬ original sound – allietripaldi
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She continues, “Like even if you had like an old, best friend, co-worker, and you continue to maintain that friendship, which I have done several times, like, the interactions are just not the same. Like you have left said society. And I don’t know. Does that make sense? Anyone? I don’t know. I’ve just been thinking about that. It’s just crazy.”

That got people thinking about work and how work brings people together—perhaps not always positively.

“Because the foundation of your friendship is the trauma you share because of the job,” one commenter offered. “When the trauma isn’t there, the foundation isn’t either.”

Another opined, “It feels like you betrayed them because you left. This is why I don’t care about friendships at work anymore. I just wanna do my job & go home.”

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Yet another had a ready comparison: “It’s like leaving your hometown. The commonality is that you’re in the same space. Once you’re out of that space, you have nothing in common.”

The TikTok inspired another creator, @jordan_the_stallion8, to put up a video on March 10 stitching the first one, and that one has drawn more than 3.2 million views. It builds upon the thoughts expressed in the first one.

“Normally when you’re at a job, you always have that co-worker or that group of co-workers, right?” he starts. “Where when you guys are together, the chemistry is amazing. It’s like you guys are best friends. When you guys are scheduled with each other, you either get no work done it all because you’re joking around all the time, or you get all the work done because you guys work so well together.”

@jordan_the_stallion8 #stitch with @allietripaldi #fypシ ♬ original sound – Jordan_The_Stallion8
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“It’s like you guys are in group chats, you’re hanging out all the time. The minute somebody quits the job, right? And they try to come back and hang out with you? It’s never the same. The chemistry never reaches back to what it originally was.”

“So if you’re working with somebody right now,” he concludes, “enjoy it while you can because the minute somebody quits … it’s not going to be the same.”

That inspired similar reactions to the first video.

“Once one of them quits, you realize you weren’t actually friends, just proximity acquaintances,” a commenter cynically observed.

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“The second someone leaves, they’re left out of the loop,” another declared. “I quit two weeks ago and literally THE DAY AFTER, they already had inside jokes without me.”

Someone pointed out those relationships can still be maintained, but there’s a bit of an irony to that.

“Work friends take a lot of work to keep after you’re gone. I’ve learned that lesson over and over.”

The Daily Dot has reached out to the creators via TikTok comment.

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The Daily Dot