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Avoid these common mistakes.
Small wonder, then, that the Russian Interior Ministry has produced a pamphlet warning citizens of the risks involved in taking selfies on active train tracks, cliffsides, and roofs, complete with helpful iconography. We get the message, loud and clear:
Still, that leaves a lot of potentially deadly selfie scenarios wide open. We thought it wise to go a step further and remind you never to take a selfie in the following situations, no matter how tempted you are:
1) While setting yourself on fire
It’s only natural to want a selfie of your self-immolation—but beware! The combination of fire, gasoline, and social media distraction can prove fatal.
2) As you chug poison
Your Facebook friends would go nuts for a selfie of you guzzling poison. That’s no reason to risk your life by pulling out your phone right then.
3) When riding a shark
Riding a shark in open water is one of the coolest, sanest things a person can do. Trying to take a selfie along the way? That’s just asking for trouble.
4) During a hostage crisis
Being a human shield is a heart-pounding thrill—there’s no denying that. Spare yourself a tragic end by not creating evidence against your abductor.
5) In the middle of a fight with UFC champ Ronda Rousey
Should be a no-brainer: Ronda Rousey prefers to do photos with fans after paralyzing them in an exhibition cage match. Don’t make her mad!
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'