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The deal of a lifetime.
So here is the deal. You can have one free Joe’s Pizza of your choice—any pie, hey you got it. But you have to take my couch. And don’t even think about doing one of those “oh we’ll be back up for the couch.” No way, I’m not falling for that again.
It’s a fifth floor walk up in East Village. Seriously. Free fucking couch. It’s a sleeper. Come get it.
Is this for real? Who burned the couch-owner the first time? What unspeakable event transpired on this piece of furniture to strip it of monetary value? How good is Joe’s Pizza? Probably; we don’t know; we don’t want to know; and pretty damn good. So get hungry and grab a seat.
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'