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Typically, when humans approach a terminal that lets us customize our own burgers, our species takes a maximalist approach.
“Oh, avocado. And a fried egg. A taleggio cheese crisp? Can’t say no to that. Definitely lettuce and onions. And a tomato slice.”
The resultant meals are towering monstrosities that are affronts to both our taste buds and our mouth circumferences.
But one man, at a McDonald’s in England, took a distinctly minimalist approach to his cheeseburger.
He placed an order for a cheeseburger at a kiosk with “NO ONION, NO KETCHUP, NO MUSTARD, NO PICKLES, NO BUN, NO MEAT.”
The result, a cheeseburger minus some of its most essential elements, was pure absurdist pleasure.
I ordered a cheese. Not sure what I expected. pic.twitter.com/3MxyKHNIw4— Merchant (@coL_Merchant) March 13, 2017
It’s Dada, it’s Kafka, but at its core, it’s existentialism distilled down to its utter essence. In fact, “I ordered a cheese” will go down as the “Mother died today” of the millennial generation, the absurd and unbelievable freedom of choice we have pushed to both its logical and most illogical endpoint.
It was purchased for 99 pence.
David Covucci is the Layer 8 editor at the Daily Dot, covering the intersection of politics and the web. His work has appeared in Vice, the Huffington Post, Jezebel, Gothamist, and other publications. He is particularly interested in hearing any tips you have. Reach out at [email protected]