Bartenders can tell.
You’re a customer and so you fit into a stereotype that veteran bartenders can smell from a mile away because they know that every drink you order is really a cry for help.
North Carolina bar owner Kenny Giard has continued his viral “What your drink says about you” series on TikTok, dropping gems like, “Ameretto Sours: Everyone who’s ever loved you was wrong.”
Giard (@kennyg_olddadtikertoker) expanded on his first “What your drinks says about you” video, which gained over 7 million views. The second installment of his series has garnered over 494,000 views as of publication.
A bartender and a standup comedian, Giard, lists a slew of drinks, poking fun at the lifestyles associated with each beverage. Lighthearted and hilarious, Giard roasts everyone.
Car Bombs: “You’re no longer invited to family functions.”
Extra Dirty Gin Martini: “You’re here celebrating your fourth divorce.”
Crown and Ginger: “Your parents refer to you as the disappointment.”
Whiskey Sours: “Your parents don’t claim you at all.”
Giard discovered TikTok during Covid-19, when his bar, The Corner Bar, was shuttered. The comic quickly found his niche on the social media app. He currently has over 259,000 followers on the app.
“The bar was shut down for about six months, and I remember my wife was in our living room, and I was…in our bedroom, and I keep hearing her laugh, and 10 minutes go by, and I’m like ‘You’re married, and we’re in a pandemic with kids in this house. What’s funny?’ And she’s like ‘TikTok…’I was like ‘What’s a TikTok?’ She showed me, and I think I said…’that seems ridiculous,’ and I think the next day, I downloaded the app,” he explained to Greensboro CBS affiliate CBS 17.
@kennyg_olddadtikertoker What your drink says about you compilation. #part2 #bartender #divebar #drinks #funny #jokes #laugh #cornerbargso ♬ original sound – Kenny Giard
Since then he has posted numerous viral videos like “What it’s like bartending in dive bars” that have gained millions of views.
Users joined in on the fun, elaborating on what their favorite drinks really mean.
“I’m the tequila drinker after 20 years of bartending,” one user wrote.
“Oooff not the crown and ginger that’s my third favorite…. moving back in with mom as we speak,” a second joked.
A Moscow Mule drinker added: “I do need constant attention from everyone. It’s why I also order fajitas at Mexican restaurants.”
With a total of 12 videos in the series, it’s a good bet that Giard will get to everyone’s favorite drink.
The Daily Dot reached out to Giard via TikTok comment for further information.