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We’re all painfully aware that a lot of cisgender men know hilariously little about periods, but one comment by a random dude about the number of tampons needed per cycle takes it to a new level.
Twitter user @aisghair shared a screencap of the comment, which was left on a PinkNews article on Facebook, and called the commenter “a fucking dweeb.”
Look at this fucking dweeb pic.twitter.com/2QFqNuqvZz
— ash (@aisghair) March 4, 2019
Using stats of unknown origin, the man claimed that the average period is between 10 and 35 milliliters of blood (he’s wrong, it’s more like 30-60 ml) and that a tampon holds about 5 ml. “So 7 tampons per cycle,” the man concludes, clearly not aware that leaving tampons in for too long can cause toxic shock syndrome.
Ignorance of the fatal disease that would be caused by his period plan aside, the hole of unknowing somehow goes even deeper. First, he suggests that the number of tampons could be upped to 10 for “ladies with an extra juicy uterine lining,” and I’m very sorry you had to read the phrase “extra juicy uterine lining.”
Then, he makes possibly the wildest claim of all: “9 periods a year = 90 tampons max.” It’s hard to imagine how this man extrapolated nine periods per year for a bodily function which people literally call “the monthly cycle.” He concluded his comment by diminishing the cost of period products, saying, “Cut down on your starbucks frapps [sic] and stop whining.”
People on Twitter had a field day with his incredible foolishness on so many fronts.
The average number is 35ml-45ml. So literally the only thing he got right was how many days are in a week.
— ˗ˏˋ 𝕒𝕧𝕒 ˎˊ˗ (@avasond) March 5, 2019
7 PER CYCLE pic.twitter.com/8mwj1A942J
— britney (@britneytsai) March 5, 2019
Nobody told me about the 4 free cycles per year. Did I have to write in to apply?
— ❄D🌹wn Oliver❄ (@Felix_keeps_on) March 6, 2019
One person even went the extra mile and did math with real data. With an average period of five days, changing your tampon with healthy frequency, and an average cycle of 28 days, the need actually comes to 390 tampons a year.
In case anyone wanted to know the ACTUAL math… pic.twitter.com/i4qCTUD59q
— ellie (@eliczaday) March 6, 2019
Dear cis dudes, before you dismiss arguments against taxes on period products, look at the real numbers of how much money it costs to prevent menstrual blood from free-flowing everywhere. And in general, don’t assume you know better than people who actually menstruate.
Alex Dalbey is a writer and zinester currently working out of St. Paul, Minnesota. They have bylines at The Daily Dot, Kill Screen, and Bullet Points. Follow them on Twitter @thedialogtree