Gene Simmons in KISS makeup

Photo via Jamie/Flickr

This newborn calf looks exactly like Gene Simmons

Genie is now in the Kiss Army.


Audra Schroeder


Posted on Aug 2, 2017   Updated on May 22, 2021, 9:55 pm CDT

A Texas calf named Genie has been alive for less than a week and has already gone viral.

The calf was born July 28 on a ranch in Kerrville, Texas, owned by Heather Leonard Taccetta. Genie’s distinctive black and white facial markings immediately drew comparisons to Kiss singer and bassist Gene Simmons, and a photo of the calf with its tongue out sealed the deal.

Hill Country Visitor, the Facebook page that posted the story, said they’ve been trying to reach Simmons for a photo op at Cowboy Steak House, which works with Taccetta’s ranch. On July 30, Simmons did acknowledge the story with a tweet. A day before Genie was born, the San Francisco Chronicle posted photos from Kiss’ 1977 show at the Cow Palace. Coincidence? (Probably.)

Reactions have varied from “LOL” to “please don’t eat Genie” to “Did Gene Simmons fuck a cow?” In recent years Simmons has been a divisive presence: He’s told depressed people to kill themselves, told immigrants to “learn to speak goddamn English,” blamed young people for killing rock, and dissed musicians with much more talent. Genie, you can move past this. Be your own calf. Make your own path.

Now we just need to get Genie and the dog that looks like William H. Macy together.

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*First Published: Aug 2, 2017, 11:16 am CDT