James Deen invented Sriracha donuts and they are an abomination

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Ladies, proceed with caution: This actually might make you want to have sex with James Deen less.

I love food. I also love James Deen. So by the transitive property (or something), I should love Deen’s newest Wood Rocket webseries (NSFW), “James Deen Loves Food.”

But if the latest episode of Deen’s series is any indication, the title seems like a misnomer. Because James Deen “loves” food the way an emotionally abusive person “loves” his partner: If he truly loved it, he would never treat it the way he does. 

In the latest episode of “James Deen Loves Food,” James Deen creates his own sick, twisted, Frankenstein-esque version of handmade donuts. The “bronuts” or “deenuts,” as he calls them, are made using Doritos, beer, and—horror of horrors—Sriracha sauce as ingredients.

The result is the culinary equivalent of extreme BDSM torture porn, minus the element of pleasure. You can check out the (vaguely NSFW) video here, if you dare:


The experience of watching James Deen sprinkle cheesy, chemically-flavored Dorito dust on a perfectly innocent glazed donut is a bit difficult to describe. On the one hand, you kinda want to pull a Chris Crocker and start tearfully screaming, “For the love of God, leave the donuts alone! Leave them alone!” On the other hand, it’s James Deen shirtless, so seeing him defile a pastry in such a fashion makes you feel both repulsed and turned-on, like watching a Miley Cyrus music video or coming across an NSFW photo of your cousin on Tinder. Either way, it’s an emotional roller coaster ride.

The Daily Dot has reached out to Deen for comment, and we’ll update if we receive a response:

H/T First We Feast | Screengrab via Wood Rocket/YouTube

 

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