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A photo of Green’s penis made its way to the “Stories” section after the Team USA player basically fucked up at privately sending his junk. Green claimed being hacked but later recanted his statement and has since apologized.
Hacked….. Can’t win right now
— Draymond Green (@Money23Green) July 31, 2016
Draymond Green said he pushed the wrong button regarding an inappropriate picture on snapchat. He apologized for the incident.
— Calvin Watkins (@calvinwatkins) July 31, 2016
For thirsty basketball fans, the NSFW snap was a gift from the nut puncher himself. Those who actually give a fuck about privacy were pretty mortified. And the internet? Well, it did what it always does when someone royally misuses technology: it roasted the shit out of him.
From dick kicks to dick pics: the Draymond Green story
— Brandon Mariano (@15bmariano) July 31, 2016
It’s unclear whether Green was low key supporting the dicks out for Harambe movement, though activists desperately want it to be true. Sure, Green’s mistake and hacking claim were cringe-worthy. What could really save face for the power forward, who’s been doing God’s work when it comes to trolling his teammates on the social media app, is coming out in favor of such a worthy cause.
If anything, it’s far more believable than being too horny to hit the right button.
A former Weekend Editor at the Daily Dot, April Siese's reporting covers everything from technology and politics to web culture and humor. Her work has been published by Bustle, Uproxx, Death and Taxes, Rolling Stone, the Daily Beast, Thrillist, Atlas Obscura, and others. Siese joined Quartz in December 2016.