It’s truly a case of a pop star standing up for herself in the face of a sometimes-unforgiving fandom. Grande announced she’d ended her relationship with Miller earlier this month after nearly two years of dating. Separately, Miller was charged with a DUI this month after crashing his car with twice the legal limit of alcohol in his blood at the time. Fans on Twitter can be merciless, and one fan named Elijah Flint posited that the crash was most likely Grande’s fault.
“Mac Miller totalling [sic] his G wagon and getting a DUI after Ariana Grande dumped him for another dude after he poured his heart out on a ten song album to her called the divine feminine is just the most heartbreaking thing happening in Hollywood,” Flint tweeted.
The tweet apparently found its way to Grande’s mentions, and the pop star sent a masterfully diplomatic reply to Flint Wednesday afternoon.
“How absurd that you minimize female self-respect and self-worth by saying someone should stay in a toxic relationship because he wrote an album about them,” Grande said in a screenshotted Notes App entry. “I am not a babysitter or a mother and no woman should feel that they need to be. I have cared for him and tried to support his sobriety & prayed for his balance for years (and always will of course) but shaming / blaming women for a man’s inability to keep his shit together is a very major problem. Let’s please stop doing that. Of course I didn’t share how hard or scary it was while it was happening but it was. I will continue to pray from the bottom of my heart that he figures it all out and that any other woman in this position does as well.”
You’d think the story might end there, or with Flint quietly deleting his original post, but it seems like Grande actually changed this guy’s perspective on the whole situation with her thoughtful reply.
In a Notes App reply back to Grande, Flint explained that he hadn’t initially understood where she was coming from, but his eyes have been opened.
“I’m really sorry this is something you took the time to read and that upset you enough to make such a thoughtful reply,” Flint wrote. “First and foremost, I know nothing about your relationship and the heartache you both feel. Second, I in no way think that you are the cause of Mac’s short comings we all have our demons to keep at bay and I truly worry about his well being just as a fan so I am sorry to minimize any of that or make it seem like a break up is a justifiable cause to go deep end. Finally, I had no idea this would go viral and get treated like a story on tmz it truly doesn’t go as deep as you’re implying and I truly hope you and Mac get back to living your best lives as soon as possible. I’m very sorry I hurt you and I’m sorry you feel my tweet stigmatizes women for ending a toxic relationship…”
Grande closed the loop Wednesday afternoon, thanking the fan for “hearing” her, and saying she appreciated his response “v much.”
thank you for hearing me, i appreciate your response v much. ☁️ sending u love.— Ariana Grande (@ArianaGrande) May 23, 2018
It’s like a master class in politely owning your haters.