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Here’s what WSJ headlines look like in emoji

texting emoji

How do you say “liberal media bias” in emoji?

Have you taken an extended vacation from the human race for the past three years and are thus unfamiliar with the concept of emojis? Then you’re a member of the target audience for this new feature on the Wall Street Journal website, which includes an explainer on what the Japanese icons are, as well as an app that lets you translate boring old WSJ headlines into emojis.

The feature lets you create and share your own emojified finance headlines, as well as emoji versions of book, song, and movie titles. Here’s my version of “China Sets Clock to End Cap on Rates”:

Here’s Tolstoy’s epic War and Peace, which I clearly have not read:

Here’s “Heavenly Currency Intervention Is Sought”:

And here’s my emoji version of the 2004 Best Picture Oscar winner Crash. It’s a brunette woman threatening to shoot a baby panda in the face, then dancing and pooping over its dead body, because that’s exactly how I feel every time I watch that movie.

 

Actually, yeah, this is super fun. I would totally start reading the paper if the headlines looked like this. Thousands of years of human thought and literacy = officially over. Thanks, WSJ!

H/T Wall Street Journal | Photo by Intel Free Press/Flickr (CC BY SA 2.0)

EJ Dickson

EJ Dickson

EJ Dickson is a writer and editor who primarily covers sex, dating, and relationships, with a special focus on the intersection of intimacy and technology. She served as the Daily Dot’s IRL editor from January 2014 to July 2015. Her work has since appeared in the New York Times, Rolling Stone, Mic, Bustle, Romper, and Men’s Health.