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In most San Francisco thing ever, there are now Uber weddings
The end of civilization is nigh.
As a service industry player, the taxi app/company Uber has its share of problems to iron out. The latest? They think, for some reason, that human beings would happily let them co-opt their wedding vows for a marketing stunt. This being San Francisco, they’re probably right.
The on-demand nuptials are only happening this Saturday, between noon and 6 p.m. Just log on, select “UberWEDDING,” and drop the pin wherever you want your awkward sponsored ceremony to happen. Upon the car’s arrival, you’ll “first work with our on-site notary to obtain your marriage license.” With that squared away, the violinist will start playing you down the aisle (sidewalk?). Flowers are provided by Bloom That, candles by bella j, dessert by SusieCakes, champagne by Iron Horse, and a gift bag by L. Sorry, you still have to bring your own friends.
The real hook, of course, is a free honeymoon, courtesy of HotelTonight and Alaska Airlines. They don’t tell you where that honeymoon will take place, but what are the odds it’s in Edmonton, Alberta? Probably no worse than 50/50. So warm up those cold feet and take the plunge—if things don’t work out, we’re sure Uber will be there to help with the divorce.
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'