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Last night, the Metropolitan Museum of Art hosted its annual Met Ball, providing an excuse for celebrities to show off their incredibly opulent ensembles and post selfies with Kendall Jenner on Instagram.
The theme of this year’s Met Gala was “China: Through the Looking Glass.” While this title was basically an invitation for non-Asian celebrities to show up wearing some kind of bastardized interpretation of “Chinese” clothes, thankfully, there were fewer examples of this than we expected. But we did get this bizarre get-up from Sarah Jessica Parker:
@bravoandy/Met Gala = standing date. Dress designed by me in collaboration with @hm. Headpiece by @philiptreacy. Custom @sjpcollection shoes. Jewelry by #fredleighton, @jfisherjewelry and @cindychao_artjewel. Bag by @fendi. @bravoandy in @ralphlauren. X, Sj #ChinaThroughTheLookingGlass
A photo posted by SJP (@sarahjessicaparker) on
If anything, Justin Bieber’s gold Balmain dragon jacket was more tasteful than SJP’s ensemble, which is something that no woman ever wants to hear.
As a palate cleanser, here’s Rihanna, whose fur-trimmed yellow cape was a total show-stopper. It was also designed by Guo Pei, making her one of the few A-list guests to actually wear something by a Chinese designer.
The comparisons between Rihanna and Sarah Jessica Parker did lead some pretty on-point Photoshop jokes, though.
If these three were intergalactic princesses, then Solange Knowles was the alien—or possibly spaceship?—costar of their Jupiter Ascending–style feminisy space opera.
Offering a twist on the sheer apparel trend, Kim Kardashian, Beyonce and Jennifer Lopez all wore sparkling sheer gowns with fishtail trains. While the women prompted a handful of idiot comments from sexist prudes on Twitter, everyone else was too busy gasping with awe to care.
FKA Twigs chose one of the more refreshingly atypical outfits of the night, a cut-out dress by Christopher Kane. It also had the distinction of being the only gown at the gala to feature a picture of a dick and balls. (They’re visible at the top of the pink thigh slit next to Robert Pattinson, by the way. We know you’re looking.)
And just to give the men their due, here’s Michael B. Jordan wearing a subtly embroidered suit and matching iridescent green shoes.
He looks cute, but we’re hoping to see more dudes in Rihanna-inspired capes next year. In the words of Solange:
Photo via Kim Kardashian/Twitter
Gavia Baker-Whitelaw is a staff writer at the Daily Dot, covering geek culture and fandom. Specializing in sci-fi movies and superheroes, she also appears as a film and TV critic on BBC radio. Elsewhere, she co-hosts the pop culture podcast Overinvested. Follow her on Twitter: @Hello_Tailor