Most of us are too bashful to call out our neighbors for their noisy sex. So when their love-making turns vociferous, we’re forced to resort to law enforcement to help us get some shut-eye.
In New York City, this type of problem is directed to 311, the hotline for non-emergency municipal services. DNA Info has compiled the complaints by neighborhood and created a handy-dandy, randy interactive map, so we can see just where the loudest romping is taking place.
The darker the red, the more common the complaints were. Dark red indicates some 50 Shades-level action.
The award for loudest sex in the five boroughs of New York City goes to a couple in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. According to 311, there were six separate complaints about this horny duo.
From January 1, 2015, to February 12, 2015, 311 received a grand total of 133 complaints about loud sex. That means that the Bay Ridge couple accounted for nearly 4 percent of all complaints. Way to go, you guys.
You have to feel for their neighbors, but you also have to feel for the neighborhoods that generated no complaints at all. Are people in the West Village or the Upper East Side so bummed by their high rents that they’ve ceased having sex?
And poor Staten Island: not a single complaint across the entire borough.
H/T DNA Info | Photo via maxp24242424/Flickr (CC 2.0)