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Teens are blaming everything in the universe on ‘The Fault in Our Stars’
John Green is destroying America.
Even as the film adaptation of John Green’s The Fault in Our Stars roars into theaters for what’s sure to be a lucrative couple of months, the teen cancer romance novel has come in for some harsh treatment—and not just at the hands of condescending, YA-bashing literary critics.
In fact, Green and his book can be blamed for just about anything, according to Twitter.
TFIOS is the reason girls are emotionally unstable
— Roth (@SupImNoah) June 6, 2014
Movies like TFIOS is the reason for theatre shootings.
— Mr. Underwood (@yaboyzac_uoeno) June 6, 2014
TFIOS is gonna be the reason why girls are going to be single
— obiwankenobi (@KobiWoodruff14) June 2, 2014
people who are overly obsessed with tfios is the reason i wanna deactivate
— judas’s daddy (@Hamxd_) June 6, 2014
TFIOS is the reason for the teardrops on my guitar…
— Kelsey Hutchinson (@kelsey_lynnne) June 6, 2014
the fact that tfios isn’t coming to rupert or any town near me is the reason illegally downloading movies is a thing
— syd (@SydneyStenset) June 5, 2014
#TFIOS is the reason why I have high standards for a relationship
— ⭐️ (@stxles_24) May 31, 2014
— Kelly Dibb (@KelzDibb) April 16, 2014
@realjohngreen, u and TFIOS is the reason I am behind in cake work today.I regret nothing. ‘cept this chocolate Pony not having legs yet.
— Ant Roman (@NerdacheCakes) January 10, 2013
Augustus Waters is the reason why i don’t have a boyfriend… #tfios
— Shelbi Shultz (@shelbi106) June 6, 2014
I bet John Green is the reason busted broke up too
— Amy (@PhillyBiy) May 1, 2013
John green is the reason the adolescent suicide rate among girls has increased
— Sammy Sidorakis (@Sammy_Sid2) June 6, 2014
John green’s book is the reason I questioned my existence
— Sharon (@Sheoarmy) May 26, 2014
John Green is the reason I have trust issues.
— ☆Becca☆ (@becca_navin) June 6, 2014
But for all the damage and chaos Green has sown, his tearjerker does occasionally have a positive effect on people’s lives—even if he’s using their sense of guilt as leverage.
Don’t think I’ve ever mentioned that John Green is the reason I am always honest with my mother. pic.twitter.com/cvMDz4nQGY
— Ben Weiner (@turnupfunction) March 28, 2014
If we’re not careful, this dude is going to turn us all into weepy, undateable moral paragons.
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'