Our Daughter is Perfect

Something’s not quite right with this child.

Here at the Daily Dot, we swap GIF images with each other every morning. Now we’re looping you in. In the Morning GIF, we feature a popular—or just plain cool—GIF we found on Reddit, Canvas, or elsewhere on the Internet.

The war between doting parents and exasperated onlookers has just hit DEFCON 1. The children have been weaponized!

Chicago GIF artist/comedian Sean Godsey rules the nebulous nexus between the banal and the bizarre. American horror master H.P. Lovecraft is the cultural heir to Edgar Allan Poe and a favorite of geeks far and wide. Put those two together and what do you get?

Well, we’re sure there’s a word for it, but it might not be pronounceable by humans.

An adorable ginger moppet. A civil, if defensive, note from her helicopter parents. Her eyes dissolving into horrid, tentactular excrescences of loathsome albino shoggoth-flesh. The eldritch, unholy fires of the nethermost pit of hell flickering behind the lone figure, stung by stuttering black lightning in which the silent, mirthless gibbering of Azathoth, the blind idiot god, is implicit. Judging by the notes, 544 corrupted souls so far.

Let’s just put this little snowflake under the general heading of “problem child” and back away slowly.

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