Great housekeeping with Glenn Danzig

Vegan Black Metal Chef has nothing on Helpful Kitchen Danzig. 


Austin Powell


Published Jan 6, 2012   Updated Jun 2, 2021, 11:04 pm CDT

The dark prince of punk rock continues to fall from grace online—all the way to the kitchen.

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First Glenn Danzig became an unintentional spokesman for Fresh Step after being photographed in a Misfits t-shirt while purchasing groceries and cat litter—a moment that led to a hilarious mashup video.

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Then came Danzig’s infamous tantrum at Fun Fun Fun Fest in Austin, Texas, in November, where his late arrival and backstage demands for “French onion soup” and space heaters sparked vitriolic comments across various Web forums, not to mention a parody set from Ted Leo & the Pharmacists.

Now there’s Helpful Kitchen Danzig.

Created on Dec. 29, the regularly updated single-subject Tumblr pairs Martha Stewart-esque household tips with a classic photo from Danzig’s post-Misfits prime. In just under a week, the blog has garnered more than a hundred followers.

Some of the remarks are appropriately gothic (“Putting salty bacon on a boil is said to draw the poison out”), but most aren’t. Here’s a small sampler:  

  • Remove tea or coffee stains from your fine china by mixing up a paste of baking soda, lemon juice, and cream of tartar.
  • To keep cookies fresh, put some crumpled-up tissue paper in the bottom of the cookie jar.
  • Don’t throw out all that leftover wine: Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
  • Use a meat baster to “squeeze” your pancake batter onto the hot griddle – perfect shaped pancakes every time.
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Here’s one more helpful tip for Danzig: Revenge is a dish a best served cold. 

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*First Published: Jan 6, 2012, 8:00 am CST